I cant say im close to 90 days yet, but with hashems help as of this morning i am 7 days clean of P and M! Its such a good feeling! Cant say it was easy but i did it. I thank everyone on this program for helping me reach this small yet big milestone. This community's amazing and its a gift to be part of it. 
On the way to 90!!!

Hey, welcome aboard! 

First off, 7 days is amazing, it's not a start, it's a great start!

For me personally, I've gained more from focusing on day 8 than day 90 but a lot of folks do find it very motivating.

I've also found that trying to stay clean from Porn & Masturbation and making it the main focus  without trying to be clean from lust hasn't worked long term and even while it "worked" it was nothing but white knuckling.

Just sharing my experiences. Hatzlocha on the journey!

Thank u! i really appreciate it! When u get a chance can u please explain to me what u mean here? Thanx

yehuda0524 wrote on 07 Sep 2022 19:17:

In a nutshell, trying to stay away from porn and masturbation without focusing on lust will be very very difficult. For example, if you are going look at girls and allow yourself  to fantasize about them, it's going to be much harder to avoid porn and masturbation. Even if you do manage to avoid it by sheer willpower and clenched fists (white knuckling), is  it sustainable for the long term?  

​It's not just lust. focusing all day on the "battle" and the fact that you have taivos and your yetzer Hora can also have detrimental effects leading to  more acting out.

LUST= Living Under Satan's Temptations. As long as your lusting it's going to be hard to stay clean  

on the other hand, finding ways to maintain reminders throughout the day to connect to hashem, and to strengthen our commitment to serve hashem in every way, will help lessen the amount of time we are actually battling.

Vehkam wrote on 07 Sep 2022 20:54:

Was thinking it over and I think it depends what your focusing on.

If your focus is on Hashem, strengthening your commitment, trying to connect to Hashem, giving the struggle over to Hashem and realizing that he could help, that's a good thing.

However, if your focus  is on the Yetzer Hora-how strong he is and how difficult this nisayon is, how severe the aveira is...That can bring you down. I'm not saying that it doesn't work for some folks but it definitely can have an adverse effect.  

Just an update, tomorrow morning will be 2 weeks beh!! A huuuuge milestone for me. just trying to keeping my eye on the prize..... sobriety.

How is it going?