Recently, a GYE chaver asked me, "What does a fall consist of for you?"
I don't know what the official rules are, but after some thought, here is what a fall consists of for me. Any or all of the following:
- Searching for illicit material (text, images, videos)--pornographic or non-pornographic--and certainly reading/viewing that material
- Masturbating -- even starting and stopping before it's too late
Again, this is what a fall is
for me, but it is helpful for me to make an actual definition. There have been many times throughout this journey when I have justified something as not a fall because I didn't necessarily include that in my undefined concept of a fall. I hope this helps in my struggle, but I also want my clean streak to be pure.
Thanks for reading this and have a good Shabbos.