Alright, I made it to my goal clean boruch hashem! I was out late last night, so I didn't post then.
Anyways, after I reached my goal, once I got back last night, I allowed myself to fall...

I'm going to try to make myself a bigger goal this time, for seven days until next Thursday night (not that I'm planning to fall then chas veshalom).
I'm also going to try what "TheNextStep" suggested, to try to document what triggers me. Thanks for the suggestion!

Regarding your second point: I'm not as tech savvy as you say you are, and I can't get around the filters I have (unless they aren't working, which has happened in the past). So, while obviously filters aren't a solution to the internal part of this problem, they do help in the moment to not act on it.
at the same time, it's impossible never to be in a situation with unfiltered internet, and I definitely need to work on a strategy for that (even if I wouldn't have an issue currently).
So theoretically would I want to filter that computer? Yes. Practically, I don't have that option, so Hashem's plan for me in this situation is to work more internally and grow from this (which needs to happen anyways כנ''ל).

Thank you bochur23 for this entire thread. It has been very hard for me to open up even on GYE, and seeing you keep on posting, about the successes and the falls, is a real chizuk for me. It shows how much you really want to change, and it seems you are doing a great job of it.

Just so you know, when you work on not acting on your problem, it is working on the solution. This is the idea of the 90-day program. It is more effective if you exercise self-control, but the main thing is breaking the habit. Keep up the good work.

Yes, I agree about filters. I was certainly not saying anything against them I think they are a good tool overall but not a complete solution. Just looking for a positive spin

Thank you for posting your journey. I get Chizuk reading your posts. To be open and honest about ones ups and downs takes real courage.

Whenever i read about Bochurim opening up about this challenge I am so impressed. When i was a bochur i really struggled and apart from the odd good stretch i found it very difficult. Looking back i could have and should have done more.. 
What you are doing is incredible and so impressive. Hashem should give you extra Siyata Dishmaya to move forward and hoping you can find a way to solve the filter issue!

Have a wonderful Shabbos and wishing you much Hatzlocho.

Just checking in before Shabbos, day 1 clean boruch hashem.
don't have time to write more, Gut Shabbos.

Shabbos was nice, and I'm still clean boruch hashem (day 2).
I learned a Dvar Torah that I think is very relevant to this fight, hopefully I'll have some time this week to write it up here.

@Yissie: not sure exactly what you mean.
In other places on the forum, I remember reading about "white-knuckling". Basically you're not acting out, but not working on changing internally either. The point over there was that besides it not working long-run (sheer willpower will eventually weaken), you're not actually changing yourself either. Could be I misunderstood (side point: either way, there is always the value of not having done the עבירה, regardless of why), and it does make sense that not acting out does weaken the habit. But the first point is still true - without a plan it (probably) won't last.
and thanks for the encouragement!

Thank you "taherlibeinu" for your words, The encouragement helps me keep pushing.

Day 3 clean boruch hashem. That's where I got to last time, so now starts the part that I'm adding this time.

I'll start the Dvar Torah (it'll probably be in a few sections), I guess either it "talks" to you or it doesn't - take it or leave it.

The relationship between hashem and yidden is likened to a קנין (see אבות פרק ו משנה י). The actual self of the person is like a קנין הגוף, while the person's actions are like a קנין הפירות (his actions being the outcome of his self).

Now, to actually master one's self - his feeling, his כחות etc - is the definition of a complete צדיק, his Yetzer Harah has no control over him, he is completely "owned" by Hashem. Most people are still working somewhat on the practical actions that he does, thoughts that he thinks etc in a constant ongoing battle, and every battle we win is another פרי which is "owned" by Hashem.

The הלכה by קנין הפירות is that one can only sell what exists - "אין אדם מקנה דבר שלא בא לעולם". In this context, this means that since his self isn't completely "owned" by Hashem like by a צדיק, one cannot guarantee anything about the future. The only thing we can focus on is the current battle going on, and by winning we give Hashem "ownership" over this פרי.

When I learned this it immediately struck me as the idea often stressed here about working on one day at a time, not focusing on what'll be tomorrow or the next day [Just going to clarify, this doesn't mean not working on a long term plan, that'll be in the next part].

(The above is based on a Sicha of the Lubavitcher Rebbe פרשת ויחי 1985).

So...
I made it to 4 days clean (more than last time), but I fell late last night, so I didn't make my goal of a week.

I needed to stay up late to do laundry, and once I was up late alone, after hours of pushing it off, I ended up falling. I don't know how to define the "trigger" over here (thanks "TheNextStep"), but I guess being alone late at night isn't a good situation in general (This should've really been obvious, but whatever).
I'll have to be more strict on this (and regarding this specific situation, make sure to do my laundry during the day...). Now I just need to remember this lesson and act accordingly with no exceptions.

My new goal is going to be until the end of Erev Rosh Chodesh, so 7 days (again...)

I have some nice solutions for you that should be able to help even if you're in a sensitive situation. Do you have a friend that you speak with about this issue? If you do, he'll make the perfect person to set as the family organizer. I had my mom set as the organizer before but she didn't really help because she would let me change the filter settings when I asked, even though I told her about the issue. My friend, who's my new family organizer, is a lot better and he's been helping me a lot. 

Back to day 1 clean boruch hashem. I noticed that after my last two falls I didn't have any difficulty restarting right away, which is something I struggled with in the past. It might have been just a technicality, but I hope I'll be able to get back up like this if I ever fall ח''ו.

Part 2 of the Dvar Torah:
There is one way to get around the above-mentioned rule ("אין אדם מקנה דבר שלא בא לעולם") - by selling the גוף לפירותיו, meaning he sells the גוף only in regards to acquiring it's פירות. What this represents in our context is that even if a person isn't holding at the level where his יצר טוב control his self completely (like the total devotion of a צדיק), nevertheless his יצר טוב still does have somewhat control over his self - at least regarding his actions practically. Therefore, he can "guarantee" that his actions will be קנוי to Hashem, even if his self isn't completely.
[This is a bit hard to explain clearly without seeing the sources that are brought in the footnotes, but I think this is enough for what I'm trying to get across].

This is more of a stretch then the previous lesson, but once I was thinking along these lines this is how I understood it: although we are regular human beings who still have תאוות urges etc, nevertheless by working on having the right mindset and making the right plan we can (almost) be certain not to fall and act out.

bochur23 wrote on 25 May 2022 03:45:

That's a great sign of change. Many guys when they fall, they binge - acting out numerous times, and resurface a few days later. A direct result of the "throwing in the towel" yi'ush, coupled with viewing one's self as a loser/rasha. 

Deciding "I am a good guy with a bad habit", and "I see guys have BH made it out - i will too b'ezras Hashem", help make that first subtle, but major change, that is step one in getting clean. 

Day 2 clean boruch hashem.
Nothing else to write.

Back at 3 days clean boruch hashem. Haven't consciously noticed any urges (until I have one, and then I always fall...).

I decided to restart the flight to freedom program (probably after shabbos), so I asked them to reset it to zero progress (it was at 100, as if I finished the whole course. Thank you "Chaim" from GYE!). Hope I'll do it right this time!

Just going to check in before Shabbos, boruch hashem day 4 clean.

I was playing around a bit on the flight to freedom website, and my success rate for the past 7 days is 86 percent (It doesn't give the option there, but from ט''ז אייר my success rate is 82 percent).
Every day clean pushes it up more!

Day 5 clean boruch hashem, Shabbos was nice. I guess now is uncharted territory (for the last month and a half).
going to start flight to freedom tomorrow בעזרת השם.