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Scientific studies show that it takes 90 days to break an addictive pattern in the mind. Start your own Log of your journey to 90 days! Post here to update us on your status and to give each other chizuk to stay strong!

TOPIC: my journey 1955 Views

my journey 23 Nov 2021 14:14 #374527

  • omoh
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i am starting my 90 days and will try to post about it as often as i can although i bh don't have regular access to the internet. i joined the 90 days last week and have since fell i was up late at night all alone and was fighting and distracting my self for a good hour or so but then i lost
:pinch: Warning: Spoiler!

Re: my journey 23 Nov 2021 15:42 #374531

  • davidt
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Welcome...
​If I may give a suggestion: please connect with a real person to help you in this journey.  We have some great people on GYE or you can connect with a trusted friend/rebbi etc. 
As they say "The opposite of addiction is not sobriety. The opposite of addiction is connection."
Hashem should be with you...
"If I am not for myself, who will be for me? But if I am only for myself, who am I? If not now, when?"
feel free to reach out @  ahavayirah@gmail.com

Re: my journey 25 Nov 2021 14:51 #374576

  • Captain
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Welcome! It's great that you don't have regular access to the internet, and should make your battle easier. But don't forget that you also need to put in the work ;-)

Please check out these great free resources. Perhaps they can give you some ideas: 
ebook- The Battle of the Generation 
Audio series- The Fight
see below in my signature for the links
In the place where ba’alei teshuva stand, even pure tzaddikim who never sinned cannot stand. (Rabbi Avohu, Brachos 34b)

Great free resources:
My favorite book for breaking free: The Battle of the Generation 
https://guardyoureyes.com/ebooks/item/the-battle-of-the-generation. Change your attitude and change your life!

Rabbi Shafier's incredible lectures on breaking free: The Fight. Download here: 
https://theshmuz.com/series/the-fight/

If you're only ready to try something small, check out an easier way to do self-talk here:
https://guardyoureyes.com/forum/4-On-the-Way-to-90-Days/378128-Captain—Shtarkemotionals-Secret90Day-Challenge

Re: my journey 29 Nov 2021 03:33 #374638

  • omoh
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how do i connect with these great people? 

Re: my journey 29 Nov 2021 03:38 #374639

  • omoh
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hey checking in and yes i am bh still clean although for some reason it didnt seem to be such a challenge this past week am sure the up coming week of chanukah will be much harder Hashem help me!  

Re: my journey 29 Nov 2021 14:11 #374652

  • omoh
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question if i woke up and realized that i fell in my sleep is that considered a fall in my 90 day chart?  

Re: my journey 29 Nov 2021 16:14 #374653

  • chaimmod
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omoH wrote on 29 Nov 2021 14:11:
question if i woke up and realized that i fell in my sleep is that considered a fall in my 90 day chart?  

Definitely not.

What constitutes a "Fall" to require restarting the count?
There are "slips" and there are "falls". "Slips" do not require restarting the count. "Falls" do require restarting.
A "Fall" is one of the following things:


  1. Intentional masturbation (with finish)
  2. Intentionally viewing improper sites
  3. Intentionally calling inappropriate telephone numbers
  4. Intentionally seeking out and reading erotica

In regard to number 2 (and 4), if someone saw something by mistake and then got a little bit carried away and kept looking at it, or even if someone saw a link and couldn't resist clicking on it but then catches themselves within a few seconds, that would only be considered a "slip", not a "fall". However, if someone decides to actively pursue viewing, that would be considered a fall.

Re: my journey 02 Dec 2021 13:31 #374710

  • omoh
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hey just checking in holding day 11 but I've got this far before so doesn't feel like the biggest deal and this morning I am having some thoughts... its a struggle but i am going to try to stay around people to let my desires pass

Re: my journey 07 Dec 2021 13:23 #374800

  • omoh
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hey still clean BH! and its day 16! the first week was easy but the last week some thoughts have been creeping up on me but i made it! still having a hard time opening up to anyone about my addiction for a few reasons but probably mostly because everyone around my thinks i am so great (i am pretty awesome!) and i don't think they can handle what i will tell them so for now i am going to try to post here and be involved with GYE 

Re: my journey 08 Dec 2021 12:08 #374816

  • Hashem Help Me
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omoH wrote on 07 Dec 2021 13:23:
hey still clean BH! and its day 16! the first week was easy but the last week some thoughts have been creeping up on me but i made it! still having a hard time opening up to anyone about my addiction for a few reasons but probably mostly because everyone around my thinks i am so great (i am pretty awesome!) and i don't think they can handle what i will tell them so for now i am going to try to post here and be involved with GYE 

So choose someone from GYE to be open with. And for the record, many many great and awesome guys struggle....
Feel free to contact me at michelgelner@gmail.com

My threads: Lessons Learned: guardyoureyes.com/forum/20-Important-Threads/335248-Lessons-Learned

                    My Story and G-d Bless GYE: guardyoureyes.com/forum/17-Balei-Battims-Forum/303036-My-story-and-G-d-bless-GYE

Re: my journey 13 Dec 2021 14:01 #374934

  • omoh
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yay made it to day 22! big deal! still not being able to just open up to a random GYE member like why should i just tell some unknown my whole story but i am finding these posts to be helpfull

Re: my journey 16 Dec 2021 13:33 #375002

  • omoh
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day 25 still clean but my brain these days is racing with ideas how to fall i will need a lot of strength for this not sure if i will make it for now my strategy is not to be alone but not always so practical 

Re: my journey 17 Dec 2021 05:41 #375020

  • gettingthere9
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day 25 still clean but my brain these days is racing with ideas how to fall i will need a lot of strength for this not sure if i will make it for now my strategy is not to be alone but not always so practical 


Hi there omoH, 25 days clean is nothing to sneeze at so kudos to you on that! Way to go!


You mention that you are being bombarded so to speak with thoughts...

Other than 'not being alone' the question you have to ask yourself is 'Do I have an actual strategy that deals with the problem?' 

​I am not saying you don't, I am just wondering... (The problem with anonymous forum is that the only info we have of you is what you write...) 

The problem isn't necessarily the finish, rather the path that leads there.

If I have to guess, Captain posted here somewhere, and he has links in his signature for great reads. Do yourself a favor and check them out!

Hatzlacha!
Hope for the best Prepare for the worst
Last Edit: 17 Dec 2021 05:51 by gettingthere9.

Re: my journey 17 Dec 2021 14:21 #375034

  • Captain
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gettingthere9 wrote on 17 Dec 2021 05:41:
If I have to guess, Captain posted here somewhere, and he has links in his signature for great reads. Do yourself a favor and check them out!

Hatzlacha!

See below
In the place where ba’alei teshuva stand, even pure tzaddikim who never sinned cannot stand. (Rabbi Avohu, Brachos 34b)

Great free resources:
My favorite book for breaking free: The Battle of the Generation 
https://guardyoureyes.com/ebooks/item/the-battle-of-the-generation. Change your attitude and change your life!

Rabbi Shafier's incredible lectures on breaking free: The Fight. Download here: 
https://theshmuz.com/series/the-fight/

If you're only ready to try something small, check out an easier way to do self-talk here:
https://guardyoureyes.com/forum/4-On-the-Way-to-90-Days/378128-Captain—Shtarkemotionals-Secret90Day-Challenge
Last Edit: 17 Dec 2021 14:22 by Captain.

Re: my journey 20 Dec 2021 13:27 #375089

  • omoh
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day 29 i hope and pray that ill make it to day 30! 
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