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Scientific studies show that it takes 90 days to break an addictive pattern in the mind. Start your own Log of your journey to 90 days! Post here to update us on your status and to give each other chizuk to stay strong!
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TOPIC: Real Joy 449 Views

Real Joy 12 Jul 2020 06:05 #352442

  • taiyvah4mitzvos
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I've recently passed my 2 year clean mark on my 7 year marijuana addiction. I've learned that the best way to beat addiction is to view it that the sober life will benefit you more (understanding the reason behind the mitzvah and it's opposing aveirah), as opposed to the "resisting temptation" method. It is clear to me that the most immediate benefit of going clean from masturbation is a feeling of real joy and sensitivity to the spiritual side of life. My depression has dropped a lot within just one week. This midah is the Yesod and without it everything else is just a house of cards. This week's parshah (פנחס) seems like the perfect time to get involved (anytime is obviously, but now, shovavim and Elul I guess you can call auspicious). May we all be zochech to shmirah from shamyim and the speedy geulah IN OUR DAYS and distance ourselves from the practices of the kingdoms of Edom (a̶m̶a̶l̶e̶k̶). Yaakov (עם ישראל) must win the INTERNAL war against Esav.

Re: Real Joy 12 Jul 2020 17:19 #352472

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Wow that's really beautiful! Keep up the good work! 

I can't agree more with your point that being clean helps you to be much happier and saves you from being depressed. For some people they just avoid feeling depressed and down about themselves, and that really helps a ton! But others can feel this much stronger and actually become motivated and take joy in winning their battles. It all depends on the attitude.
In the place where ba’alei teshuva stand, even pure tzaddikim who never sinned cannot stand. (Rabbi Avohu, Brachos 34b)

Great free resources:
My favorite book for breaking free: The Battle of the Generation 
https://guardyoureyes.com/ebooks/item/the-battle-of-the-generation. Change your attitude and change your life!

Rabbi Shafier's incredible lectures on breaking free: The Fight. Download here: 
https://theshmuz.com/series/the-fight/

If you're only ready to try something small, check out an easier way to do self-talk here:
https://guardyoureyes.com/forum/4-On-the-Way-to-90-Days/378128-Captain—Shtarkemotionals-Secret90Day-Challenge

Re: Real Joy 31 Aug 2021 00:45 #372036

  • taiyvah4mitzvos
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Hey everyone. I can't remember exactly what my mindset was when I made the first post but it seems as if I was in intense pain just from the wording I used. I've been struggling with this toxic addiction since I was just 10 years old when I accidentally saw some porn on my TV that was supposed to be pay per view but was somehow free. It has distorted my world view for 18 years. I slipped some time after this post as last year was so horrendous, however recently I believe I hit rock bottom. I'm so disgusted with all this shmutz and had an emotional breakdown where I realized the pain simply outweighed the pleasure. Something clicked in my brain B"H and I feel like I have a second chance at happiness. This is my longest streak so far. The yirah and disgust I have toward this is so strong that that, alongside the benefits of being clean (which have to be experienced to truly be understood) give me some hope. Remember, don't even glance at this stuff it's toxic all around. Stay strong. 
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