Steve wrote on 06 Jan 2010 23:32:
Pickle youv just 3 points for that!!! :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D

Good joke STeve!!

I've been reading your stuff on a variety of threads.... Good stuff Steve, you are mamaesh dialed in! Hat's off 2 u!!!

A groise Danke.

Now what's your opinion on the sunject at hand, hmmmmmmmmmmm..................?

Velo matzassi laguff tov min hashtika...

I'm not ready to answer this one...

habaletaher wrote on 07 Jan 2010 04:37:


Haba, you are a whole lot wiser than this old retch.

I wish I had had your foresight. Now it seems I have hurt some feelings. I gave the impression I was jumping on someone else's bandwagon, when I was only seeking clarification. I only meant to encourage introspection. I never imagined it could do damage. I thought i was being careful to express myself in a non-accusatory way, but it was not interpreted that way. If I had known that, been wiser like you, I never would have added these thoughts to anyone's thread but my own. Maybe not even here.

If you know anyone who was effected, please let them know that I posted the following here. I don't have the courage to send it directly to anyone.


PUBLIC NOTICE TO EVERYONE:

I am really, truly sorry that i have upset people, men & women, on this heilige forum. I have a deep respect and concern for all of you, and I feel terrible that I upset the balance between friends whose fellowship runs much deeper and longer than my presence here. I am especially upset with myself because there are those whose resolve had weakened due to my comments, because of the RID I caused them, and perhaps c"v even felt a sense of betrayal - here I had been someone who gave them chizuk and cared (and very sincerely, please believe me!), and now I'm someone who has caused them pain. And in their own threads, which is supposed to be their safe haven, where they have every right to express themselves freely, and now they think i am trying to take that right away or make them feel guilty for exercising that right.

And I have been woken up to the tremendously UNFAIR and difficult strain that the ladies are constantly faced with, looking over their shoulders to see if their innocent words and acts are construed by self-concious and judgmental men as un-sniyus. They are just being themselves, and have every right to do so. It is OUR problem, MY problem, not theirs. A judgmental man does not belong reading the women's forum, if any at all. We must learn to respect the opinion, level, and personality of every member of these pages.

To be honest, I imagine I'm not alone in my envy of the Women of Valour I've met here, and in life. Their easy going friendly banter is something sorely lacking in the testosterone-oriented male world. Most men don't know how to let their guard down, and be themselves. Your rich relationships, and your closely emotional yet wise connections to Hashem and other human beings, makes me realize how much more fulfilling your lives can be than mine. The male world of "work" and "don't feel" is a very lonely one, ladies. And that is what brings so many men over to read and watch what's going on at the Women's forums. Deep down, we are jealous of your beautiful lives, and we want that for ourselves, but don't know how to get there among ourselves. And we are all hard-pressed to admit that, cuz it's not macho.

I believe it is very important to for the holy men and holy women on this forum to continue to communicate and commune with each other on the neshamadige level they have been on. We ALL at times get even greater chizuk just knowing we have friends out there that understand us, and that speak the same language. That is true friendship, true support that really counts. The ability to laugh together only strengthens you, and after all your hard work and beautiful months of growing, you do not deserve to have your resolves thretened because of numbskulls like me.

I've said this before, and it deserves repeating here: We have an opportunity at GYE to develop that care and concern for the neshama of each other, no matter what their gender is. I think every younger man on this forum will make a better husband one day because of how he is treating the young ladies on this forum today. He has learned how to be sensitive and understanding, and how to lift another with good humor, not just with lectures.

I should have done what everyone here already knows: Trusted Reb Guard and the other Moderators. If they saw no reason to intervene, then the comraderie and expression are more than acceptable, they are as i said above, perfectly in line with the heilige purpose of this site. Who the heck do I think I am, anyway?

I sincerely apologize. Please forgive me. And let me know what i can do to "make it right."

With a heart heavy and hurting itself,

Steve, (the guy with the pickle-juice all over his face...)

thank you

Im Efhser Lekalkel Efhse Letaken...Something like that... Your alright Steve...You really were there for me when I needed you...I'm confident you'll continue to be.

Steve im nt sure what your talking abbout. To me it sure seemed that you were balancing things out quite well. Oh well i guess you cant always win. :-\ :-\ :-\ :-\

Well, IT, it's like this...

I never meant to accuse any woman or man that they were consciously using cute spelling and slang to flirt. I never expected it would make the girls feel angry and no longer safe at GYE. And I NEVER would suggest that any of the posts on this forum would trigger anyone. Everyone has always been so careful.

All I suggested was introspection. It was my stupidity and lack of understanding - the holy women are more introspective than I'll ever be!! They have already DONE that, and I added fuel to the fire started by someone else by suggesting that we all need to examine ourselves again. I insulted their already proven integrity.

I meant well, but I hurt those I never wanted to hurt. And i just discovered Habib left. It pains me to think I might have been partially to blame. G-d in Heaven, I hope not!!

Mom is right, that her daughters are pulling it together and coming out stronger for the adversity. I so want to visit their threads and tell them how proud I am of how they've handled it, and to say I'm sorry to Trying especially, but I'm afraid i'm not welcome there anymore.

Was i really part of the problem? Am I being neurotic over here?

Please someone give me a perspective. I'm not really able to function very well right now....

oh..steve!
I don't have any more words. I think i already told you everything . None of it was your fault. Your posts  have proven time and time again what I alway knew..your intentions were good and that's all that matters. 

You are ALWAYS welcome on my thread.

In fact , I consider it a compliment and honor that you have chosen to do so.

So...pickle aint in a pickle anymore?? 

No Way, Hose. This Dilly won't be so silly no mo-ah.

Now I understand better the "magic" of a 9th Step Call. Or was that a 9th Step Post? Or a 9th Step Email...?

Someone once said that it is better to forgive than be forgiven. They are off their rocking Chair! being forgiven is

GEVALDIG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(note the subtle use of pink, ladies....)

Maybe I'll be able to get some work done around here, instead of walkin' around with my tail between my legs.

(i know, IT, pickles don't have tails...beat ya to it!!)

G'nite y'all.

Dear Reb Steve,

Your last couple of posts earned you a Reb in your title, you displayed an incredible depth of emotion, insight, and courage. Don't get in a pickle, you're fine, we are all fine, everyone is fighting for the same thing, we just all have different weapons and use them differently sometimes, which causes a little pain and confusion here and there, but that itself is part of the growth of this incredible GYE community!

Keep Rocking in the Free World!!

At least i can say im second only to STEVE. Cmon man pipe it down. Ya did nuttin wrong. Your only a pickle dont forget. Peolpe dont usually listen to pickles much. Or else they are really sour!! :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D

Steve - you are the best - Keep up the good work - do not be detracted.  You are a voice of reason.  We are addicts and will get our fix any way we can (even if it means flirting on GYE) - I for one will take your comments as a way to strengthen myself and be more careful.

steve, yu da man!