I’m currently on day 36. While doing research on my wife’s laptop, an inappropriate picture came up while In middle of an innocent looking article Baruch HaShem I was able to resist the urge, but then had a strong desire to view porn. I ended up typing things that could lead to inappropriate images , and I slipped by gazing at an image that while wasn’t pornography by a far cry , wasn’t exactly a picture of a big tzaddik . I wouldn’t consider this a fall , as I successfully resisted the urge to view pornography , but Being that a similar situation led to my fall the last time I tried 90 days , maybe anyone has some advice? 

Sorry to hear about that.



Was it the picture of a REGULAR tzaddik by any chance?

This happened to me yesterday. I got up nice and early and put on an spinning class on my laptop but the landing page went to youtube first and I felt the "whiskey rise to my head" and realised where I was: alone, everyone else sleeping, the website obviously having successfully thwarted my filter... the juices sloshing in my brain felt more delicious by the second! I felt alive!

What I did was whisper a small prayer to surrender it. I also disclosed the incident later on in my daily sobriety renewal. It's the small things that keep me sober one more day. I am grateful for that.

There was once a man who was extremely careful with shemiras einayim.  Whenever he went outside, he would look at the ground, so as not to inadvertently see a woman.  Everything went fine and well for this individual, until the inevitable happened.  To his dismay, the man inadvertently bumped into a... street pole!  He immediately ran to his Rebbe with a worried look on his face and exclaimed, “Rebbe, I’m trying so hard not to look at anything I shouldn’t, and now I’ve just bumped into a woman!”  The Rebbe responded, “I don’t understand.  For my entire life, I’ve been trying to train myself that if I ever bump into a woman, I should think that it’s a pole.  And you’ve turned every pole into a woman?!”


How, then, should one deal with inappropriate thoughts and sights?  They should be treated as if they are a bag of garbage, waiting for the garbage collector to come.  Just as you wouldn’t open the garbage bag to investigate if there’s something good there, so, too, a person should work on himself to consider these thoughts and sights as if they are nothing and just continue on his way.  The focus should be to continue on with ‘business as usual’ without even analyzing what just happened.

A slip is dangerous because it shakes you up.
So you feel unbalanced and you seek comfort..in another slip which leads to a fall.
But a slip can happens to us on here, it is part of being clean.

Regard the slip as a hint that you have to be on your guard.
Do this by being positive, being nice to yourself, not putting pressure on yourself.
Eat well, exercise, read something you like.

Feel good about yourself.

There's a popular rule when it comes to these things called the "3 second rule." It goes like this: There are going to be times when something inappropriate will pop into your screen. It doesn't matter how good your filter is, that's just whats going to happen. Of course, it's not your fault for it being there, but you have to be careful. You have 3 seconds until that image can affect your mind so you have to get rid of it within those 3 seconds.If you see it, delete it. Its that simple. Don't give yourself time to think about it or keep on staring at it because then you're in trouble. Just delete it. It may take some practice but once you get used to it, it will be a major help.

Just remember the 3 second rule. Good luck on your battles!!!