This will not be easy; at least, I can acknowledge that. Otherwise, if I were too optimistic about this, without recognising the challenge ahead of me for what it is, I would be fooling myself. My first concern, regards what may have led to my demise in the past, when I let a false rationalization lead me into an aveirah. Rather, I should not give any credence to Freud 's instinct theory, that is based on the model of a steam engine. As if there is any truth to the claim, on his part, that there is a necessary release of libido energy that is natural (through an act that is actually forbidden according to Torah). H'Shem, may I not fall prey to this, or any other rationalization to do what is impermissible. 

Shlemiel wrote on 02 Apr 2020 06:00:


It takes great effort to decide to change, and even more effort to stick to that resolution for even a short time.

As we know, effort is all that matters, and every instant of effort is priceless. The battle against desire is a challenging, lifelong battle, and it was not created to be easy. It is supposed to be a struggle, and the odds are strong that some battles will be lost.

But by keeping his determination to fight despite the difficulty, a person can achieve the ultimate success: emerging victorious from the most intense battle ever.

You should feel proud and encouraged about every ounce of effort. As a result, you will emerge stronger from your errors!

Thank you for your response.
I see every effort as having great potential.
I know from my past experience that
each hurdle can bring me to the next level.
The kedushah will accrue over time,
- H'Shem willing. Yehi ratzon.
Shalom.