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yehuda the addict
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Scientific studies show that it takes 90 days to break an addictive pattern in the mind. Start your own Log of your journey to 90 days! Post here to update us on your status and to give each other chizuk to stay strong!
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TOPIC: yehuda the addict 2066 Views

yehuda the addict 27 Feb 2009 09:59 #3360

  • yehuda
Hi to all the tzadikim on this site, I came across GUE by chance and my life has already changed.

I don’t know if I deserve to be on this site or on the wall of honour, my nisyoinois seem to be far less intense than those of most people here, in the past I would never have considered my self an addict, that is until I read some of the things on the site, I now know that I’ve been in denial.

I can go for weeks totally clean during those periods I am ALWAYS convinced that these issues are behind me never to return again, I would consider myself totally beyond even being capable of such things! But inevitably I would have lapses (porn not mast), these cycles have been going for years, its amazing how the mind can convince that there is no problem when it is so clear that these patterns are ongoing.

There may be an advantage to being intensely trapped, at least than you know your addicted and need help.

I want to try and be clean for 90 days which would be till shavuois, I wont post regularly bur if and when it becomes a struggle I will come here for support.

Ps:

1-
To the people behind this site: I’m jealous of the huge zechusim that you have! Hashem has chosen you to be his shluchim to help his children in this most amazing way.

2-
Being that porn is often associated with depression I would strongly urge anyone who is -even if only occasionally and very mildly- depressed to consider a natural product called ‘5htp’ it helps raise serotonin levels in the brain and in my experience it is hugely effective, studies have shown that this natural compound is more effective than proscribed anti depressants, (see ‘optimum nutrition for the brain’ by Patrick Holford).

 
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Re: yehuda the addict 27 Feb 2009 14:26 #3363

  • Mevakesh Hashem
Yehuda,

Baruch Haba!!! 

By joining us, you have helped weaken the yetzer Hara's power!

Chazak V'Ematz!

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Re: yehuda the addict 27 Feb 2009 14:59 #3365

  • Shomer
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Wecome yehuda and thanks for sharing!

I think that many of us do feel jealous of you as many of our nesyonos are very very intense. 

You have certainly come to the right place to help kick this terrible habit once and for all.

Hatzlacha!
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Re: yehuda the addict 11 Mar 2009 09:43 #3677

  • yehuda
Hi everybody,

I guess I’m back sooner than I expected to be, I had a bit of a slip on Purim (flirting, initiating something that could have had disastrous results).

I have not let it pull me down though, Hashem is still part of my life (in the past this would have led to a downward spiral), and I think I may even have learned from it.

One of the things that seems to be helping me is the acknowledgement that this is an addiction (–the buzz / rush / excitement that I feel when engaging in these things are chemicals that are secreted in the brain and I am addicted to them) helps put things in perspective,

This morning I already put this realisation to practice I postponed my response to some trigger by waiting a few minutes and seeing it for what it really is and low and behold the buzz was gone.

Thanks to all of you once again.

Yehuda the addict 
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Re: yehuda the addict 11 Mar 2009 11:47 #3681

  • the.guard
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That is very enlightening. Hashem has given you wisdom to help you in your struggle. Thank you for sharing that, it may find itself in a Chizuk e-mail soon :-)
Webmaster of www.guardyoureyes.org - Maintaining Moral Purity in Today's World. We’re here on a quest ; it’s really all a test. Just do your best and G-d will do the rest.
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Re: yehuda the addict 11 Mar 2009 11:55 #3682

  • mdmjerusalem
We are very proud you joined the group and your growth is inspiring us all
Keep up and stay alert
please share further advancements
Last Edit: 11 Mar 2009 12:00 by .
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