I personally have a pair of non-see-through sunglasses which I use for when I need to be in temptation zones. From the outside, no one can see my eyes. From the inside, I placed transparent non-see-through lamination paper, which is sticky on one side. I stuck it onto the inside of the lenses and I can only see vague shapes when I walk in the street. (I can also look down and see my feet while wearing the glasses, so I don't bump into anything when I walk). I have these glasses for a few years already, and my kids know that whenever I need to go to a mall or somewhere like that, I bring them along. Obviously they are not practical for all situations. For example, if we went out to eat with the family, I usually remove them once we are seated, making sure that I am facing a wall, or at least away from the crowds. Also, if I need to talk with someone, I remove them to see their face and not to look rude.
But the glasses do more than just protect me. Listen to this:
Just recently, my wife gave birth. Connected to the hospital is a mall. I brought my kids to visit my wife and the baby, and then they wanted to eat out in the mall. I had my "sun-glasses" with me and put them on when we went into the mall. I had my kids hold my hands to make sure I go the right way and don't bump into anyone. It has become somewhat of a sport between my kids to hold my hands while I wear these special glasses. I explained to my 12 year old son, who B"H doesn't know anything yet about these things, that Shmiras Ainayim is a very important step to Kedusha and to becoming a Tzadik. Even though he doesn't know why, I bring it up with him from time to time and stress how important it is not to look at women, especially non-religious women who are not dressed Tzniusdik. (I believe that if you start young enough, they don't ask questions and don't need to understand too much. It just becomes ingrained in their minds...) So we were walking along, and my kids were holding my hands, and I was telling my son that he should look down and not look around at the non-tzniusdik pictures all around...
We found a table, ordered some sandwiches (don't forget this is Israel, there are Glat-kosher bakeries even in non-religious malls :-), and then I went downstairs to buy a bottle of drink for the kids to share. When I came back up, my daughter (age 11) tells me that while I was gone, an Arab cleaning worker had pulled a magazine full of dirty pictures out from the trash bin and put it down, open, in front of my son. My son had pushed it away from himself right away, and asked my daughter to throw it back into the trash. The Arab worker had come by a few times to look if my son was looking at the magazine, but he saw that my son had pushed it away and that they had thrown it back into the trash, so he left him alone.
I was fuming mad, but I held myself back. After the meal, I found the Arab's supervisor and told him what had happened - in front of the Arab, who denied doing it (of-course). The supervisor was shocked and told me that they already had had problems with this guy in the past and would "take care of him". The next day when I came back to take my wife home, I again met this supervisor who told me that they were going to fire him.
My point though is, that when we take these type of precautions, we aren't just protecting ourselves. If I hadn't been talking about Shmiras Ainayim and wearing these sunglasses just a few moments before this happened, I don't know if my son would have pushed the magazine away so fast, or even at all. And who knows if this wouldn't have been the start of another "story" like so many others on our website which often start with: "I first discovered p-rn at 12 years old when a friend showed it to me. etc..."
What we do, effects our children more ways than we can imagine - even if we are not aware of it! May Hashem protect the innocent children of Klal Yisrael from the Yetzer Hara, in the merit of our own determination to purify ourselves. Amen!
Momo, in your honor I will send the above post in today's Chizuk e-mail on Shmiras Ainayim!
