Wow - i'm glad that your new system is working for you, and...well, I hope everything works out for you!

All we can do is keep truckin'!

imtrying25 wrote on 04 Jan 2010 22:18:


Very glad you have surpassed you personal best!!!

wow IT. Sticky sitch. It must be soo hard.   (the story's funny though.. :D)
We know u'll do the right thing
I forgot to daven for u today  :-\ Will pray now.
Pls update..We're thinkin about u!

I'm confused about how your wife doesn't know you're an addict, but whatever. Keep it up IT!

i think IT's wife thinks he just gives all the p and m addicts chizzuk....
that's a smart way to get out of telling her, btw.
totally something that i would do...
like- no, i'm just making sure there's no p*** on the comp cuz of the kids.. no, what? this just popped up, i think we have a virus, lemme take care of it... no, don't watch, it's gonna take a long time... i'm just gonna fix the problem... lol.

habib613 wrote on 05 Jan 2010 04:32:
Am i being made fun of by my very own sistas??

TrYiNg wrote on 05 Jan 2010 03:01:
Honestly i had a harder day yesterday. mAybe it had to do with...........................

am I being blamed by my very own brotha?

Glad ur doin good  Will try to remember from today on..imyh

imtrying25 wrote on 05 Jan 2010 09:18:

chas vechalila!
i used to do that...
funny how after i got my own laptop the family computer never got any more viruses....

habib613 wrote on 05 Jan 2010 04:32:


i forgot to mention that this is true, so it's not even a lie!

IT, just saw this.

Don't listen to everyone telling you to tell you wife. It has to be your decision. You know your wife.

But, realize that your relationship will never be the same if you tell her. It might be stronger, or worse, but it definitely will be different.

Some guys enjoy the freedom and chizuk they get after telling. Some are taken to divorce court.

In my humble opinion, I think a lot of it has to do with how much she already knows. If you think she already knows, and she starts asking you questions about it, you might want to say something.
If she hasn't figured it out, you may not want to tell her.

By the way, even if you tell her, you don't have to go through all of the details. I don't think wives want or need to know how often their husbands are motzei zera. Just be general, like you have an "internet problem" with all the pritzutz around, but let her know that you're working on yourself.
If you tell her, make sure you tell her it's not her fault, and that you love only her.
If you've never cheated on her, make sure to tell her that too.

Good luck.

Oh, just remembered. If you tell her, expect her to be "cold" toward you for a day or two until it sinks in. That's a normal reaction.
Even if she's "cold" to you, tell her A LOT that you love her and how much she means to you.
She'll feel betrayed that you're not the guy she thought she married. There is no way to undo that.  :-\

Women.
Shver.
:-\

By the way, a person who is not an addict has NO IDEA what it's like to be an addict.

Ok had a hard day today. Just didnt have the feel from the moment i woke up. Had some slips today but thanks to k9 and a little bit of sense , no falls! Hoping tomorrow brings a brighter day. Thanks to all those who are constantly being mechazek me. Oh and trying thats one more day of davening you owe me.

Sorry to hear you had a hard day.  Its always good to try and stay positive.  KUTGW!!!  I am sure tomorrow will be better.  Try to keep it simple.