Anyways, back to our regularly scheduled Grouching. 

Nothin’ like a good Monday to start off the week. Can’t even wait to see what the rest of the week will be. 

Mondays you say?

How about getting all the kiddos ready for daycare and camp solo, including a detour to the keli mikva, then at the final drop off realizing I left one lunch at home and having the camp counselor say "well that's what happens when you leave the Father in charge, right?" 

I think my feigned amusement was convincing. 

Please don't teach my daughter that all men are like Papa from the Berenstein Bears. And even those who are, that's not a free ticket to check out. If you want to marry an adult child AND facilitate his incompetence, that's your business. Keep your opinions to yourself.

BenHashemBH wrote on 14 Jul 2025 14:53:

Yes. “Mondays”, I say. 
And if you want more of a Grouch?

I really hate being sick, especially when I could’ve prevented it by going to sleep at normal hours, but nooo, I had to go and stay up till nutty hours. And for numerous nights. Blech.

I think you get double points for grouching about something which is your fault, and perhaps triple for grouching about the fact that it's your fault

simchastorah wrote on 22 Jul 2025 09:22:

Grrr... What has The Grouchery come to? 
Back in the days of old, yay, even before yours truly usurped, way back when this thread was as fresh as a newcomer optimistic GYE member who thought life was sugar and dandy... people didn’t give a FLYING FLIP if their Grouches got “points”, or Thank You’s, or such similar nonsense. People came on here to Grouch, and to The Happery (still available to start, byw) with you if you gave a flying bit of positivity- as the OG (Original Groucher) clearly laid out in his first post to fire this place up. 

And the worstest part of it? He (the OG) has apparently gone down without any swinging- even hitting that meaningless blue button under the posts. Oy. על אלה אני גרווצ׳.

tzitzis dude wrote on 24 Jul 2025 03:05:

Now THAT was a grouch! 10 points!

Most Esteemed Lord, the exalted and revered Tzitzis dude,
With the utmost humility and reverence, I implore thee to bestow upon thy devoted serfs the cherished knowledge of how to articulate our grouches with skill and flair. We would be forever bound in gratitude, our hearts filled with loyalty, should it please your noble and gracious self to illuminate our path with your wisdom.
Your guidance would be the light in our humble existence!

chancyhk wrote on 24 Jul 2025 18:58:

Oh boy, you are askin' for it...

eerie wrote on 24 Jul 2025 20:02:

Chancy was heating up some leftover lukshen and cheese, when his phone suddenly buzzed:

“HEY! I’m stopping by your part of town and always wanted to meet you! -Youknowwho

His thumb shook as he typed:

“Haha who is this lol wrong number”

Not a wrong number, Chancy. Be there soon!   

Chancy glanced around in wild-eyed horror. Was Eerie right? Had he asked for it?? Was it something he said?

The microwave beeped. The kitchen lights flickered, just once, but enough to make the hair on his neck stand up.

Knock knock knock.

Three polite knocks at the door.

Chancy cracked the door open. No one. The street was empty, the air heavy and humid.

His phone buzzed again.

“Check your cabinet, buddy!”

Chancy’s head snapped toward the kitchen cabinet above the sink. It was glowing faintly. A sickly, pulsing red, like the last ember of something that should have burned out but refused to die…

He inched closer, the hum growing louder, vibrating the cheap glasses inside. The glow throbbed in time with his heartbeat.

Thump...thump...thump…

A thin wail drifted from behind the cabinet door.

At first, it sounded like pipes. Then, like crying. A child’s whimper, “Chaaanccyyy…”, barely audible, scraping at the edges of his sanity.

His hand hovered over the handle.

The crying grew sharper, layered, as if many small voices joined in, pleading, giggling, weeping, echoing in the walls.

“Chancy, Chancy, Chancy…”

He tried to back away, but the handle twitched, heat radiating from it. Paint bubbled on the cabinet doors, tiny handprints searing themselves into the wood.

Knock knock knock…from inside.

Something brushed the other side of the cabinet door, scratching softly, like tiny claws on wood.

Chancy’s hand moved as if with a life of its own. Gripped the handle…

The hum rose to a scream, the red glow flaring like a furnace.

CLICK.

He pulled the cabinet open.

They rushed out.

Bloody, bewitched squirrels exploded into the kitchen like a shrieking, clawing river of fur and teeth, their matted fur patchy with dark gore, eyes burning coals, tails slapping against the cabinet as they leapt for him.

The crying turned to squeals, high, sharp, unnatural squeaks that layered into laughter.

“SQUEEEEEEK!!!REVERED LORD, CHANCY!!! SQUEEEEK!”

They bit down on his ankles, claws digging in, tails wrapping around his legs like ropes. One squirrel, its teeth black with blood, stared up at him, squeaked, and lunged for his throat.

Chancy screamed, stumbling backward, arms flailing as the squirrels clawed up his bathrobe, gnawing, squealing curses in a language he did not know…

They sounded like children, but the giggles twisted into snarls as they dug in, leaving bloody pawprints across the floor.

The red glow pulsed, illuminating the squirrels’ slick, glistening fur, the wet red streaks they left on the counters as they skated after him.

One squirrel, perched on the fridge, squeaked a high, mocking “Chancy!”, then dove at his face.

Chancy bolted, screaming, out of the kitchen, crashing into the hallway as squirrels chased him, nipping at his heels, tails slapping, squeaking, “Revered lord, huh?! Revered lord, huh?!”

He slammed out the front door, stumbling into the night, the squirrels pouring after him, eyes like tiny lanterns in the dark.

From the open kitchen, the cabinet slowly creaked closed on its own, the glow fading, a soft sigh escaping from the cracks…

Chancy’s phone buzzed one last time on the kitchen floor, screen lighting up with YKW’S final message:

“Hey, it was a pleasure! Hope we see each other again sometime;)”

youknowwho wrote on 24 Jul 2025 21:10:

... So, what I’ve gathered from all this is that the OG IS BACK!!!!