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TOPIC: Siri & co. 683 Views

Siri & co. 26 Mar 2020 14:50 #348093

  • tzitzis dude
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This thread is gonna be for all the groaners we’ve gotten from Siri (and Alexa, and others). Here goes 

I asked my new friend to meet me at the gym, but he never showed up. 
I guess the two of us aren’t going to work out.
For anybody who recognizes my avatar, just know that you automatically have respect in my eyes.
 “Verbing weirds language”
-Calvin. 
“Getting an inch of snow is like winning ten cents in the lottery”
-also Calvin.
“Pornography is a bad answer to a good question”
-R’ Daniel Kalish
“True bitachon means accepting all inconveniences; not just the convenient inconveniences.”
-Rabbi Dovid Kaplan.

Re: Siri & co. 19 Aug 2020 20:26 #354004

  • tzitzis dude
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Which rock group has four guys who can’t sing or play instruments?

Mount Rushmore.
For anybody who recognizes my avatar, just know that you automatically have respect in my eyes.
 “Verbing weirds language”
-Calvin. 
“Getting an inch of snow is like winning ten cents in the lottery”
-also Calvin.
“Pornography is a bad answer to a good question”
-R’ Daniel Kalish
“True bitachon means accepting all inconveniences; not just the convenient inconveniences.”
-Rabbi Dovid Kaplan.

Re: Siri & co. 19 Aug 2020 20:27 #354005

  • tzitzis dude
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To the two criminals who stole my calendar:

I hope you both get six months.
For anybody who recognizes my avatar, just know that you automatically have respect in my eyes.
 “Verbing weirds language”
-Calvin. 
“Getting an inch of snow is like winning ten cents in the lottery”
-also Calvin.
“Pornography is a bad answer to a good question”
-R’ Daniel Kalish
“True bitachon means accepting all inconveniences; not just the convenient inconveniences.”
-Rabbi Dovid Kaplan.

Re: Siri & co. 19 Aug 2020 20:28 #354006

  • tzitzis dude
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My printer just told me that it was joining a band. 
Which makes sense. 
It loves to jam.
For anybody who recognizes my avatar, just know that you automatically have respect in my eyes.
 “Verbing weirds language”
-Calvin. 
“Getting an inch of snow is like winning ten cents in the lottery”
-also Calvin.
“Pornography is a bad answer to a good question”
-R’ Daniel Kalish
“True bitachon means accepting all inconveniences; not just the convenient inconveniences.”
-Rabbi Dovid Kaplan.

Re: Siri & co. 19 Aug 2020 20:29 #354007

  • tzitzis dude
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Why did the belt go to jail?
It held up a pair of pants.
For anybody who recognizes my avatar, just know that you automatically have respect in my eyes.
 “Verbing weirds language”
-Calvin. 
“Getting an inch of snow is like winning ten cents in the lottery”
-also Calvin.
“Pornography is a bad answer to a good question”
-R’ Daniel Kalish
“True bitachon means accepting all inconveniences; not just the convenient inconveniences.”
-Rabbi Dovid Kaplan.

Re: Siri & co. 20 Aug 2020 01:23 #354020

  • Meyer M.
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I'm going to look for the laffy taffy box now....
Your best teacher for success is your last mistake

Re: Siri & co. 21 Aug 2020 00:24 #354054

  • Happy58
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Why was 6 afraid of 7?
Apparently 7 is some kind of number cannibal.

Re: Siri & co. 21 Aug 2020 08:24 #354066

  • tzitzis dude
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Happy58 wrote on 21 Aug 2020 00:24:
Why was 6 afraid of 7?
Apparently 7 is some kind of number cannibal.

LOVE IT!!!!
On a similar note, why is Yoda afraid of Seven?
Because Six Seven Eight.
For anybody who recognizes my avatar, just know that you automatically have respect in my eyes.
 “Verbing weirds language”
-Calvin. 
“Getting an inch of snow is like winning ten cents in the lottery”
-also Calvin.
“Pornography is a bad answer to a good question”
-R’ Daniel Kalish
“True bitachon means accepting all inconveniences; not just the convenient inconveniences.”
-Rabbi Dovid Kaplan.

Re: Siri & co. 25 Oct 2020 13:51 #356657

  • tzitzis dude
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If your band ever goes on tour, make sure you bring along a Latvian sound engineer. 
And a Czech one, too. 
And a Czech one, too. 
For anybody who recognizes my avatar, just know that you automatically have respect in my eyes.
 “Verbing weirds language”
-Calvin. 
“Getting an inch of snow is like winning ten cents in the lottery”
-also Calvin.
“Pornography is a bad answer to a good question”
-R’ Daniel Kalish
“True bitachon means accepting all inconveniences; not just the convenient inconveniences.”
-Rabbi Dovid Kaplan.

Re: Siri & co. 25 Oct 2020 13:52 #356658

  • tzitzis dude
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Never trust an atom. They make up everything. 
For anybody who recognizes my avatar, just know that you automatically have respect in my eyes.
 “Verbing weirds language”
-Calvin. 
“Getting an inch of snow is like winning ten cents in the lottery”
-also Calvin.
“Pornography is a bad answer to a good question”
-R’ Daniel Kalish
“True bitachon means accepting all inconveniences; not just the convenient inconveniences.”
-Rabbi Dovid Kaplan.

Re: Siri & co. 25 Oct 2020 13:52 #356659

  • tzitzis dude
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A bad limbo player walks into a bar. 
For anybody who recognizes my avatar, just know that you automatically have respect in my eyes.
 “Verbing weirds language”
-Calvin. 
“Getting an inch of snow is like winning ten cents in the lottery”
-also Calvin.
“Pornography is a bad answer to a good question”
-R’ Daniel Kalish
“True bitachon means accepting all inconveniences; not just the convenient inconveniences.”
-Rabbi Dovid Kaplan.
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