Hi,
I want to share a technique that was very helpfull to me when I wanted to stop once and for all from masturbating. I commited to myself that every time I lose myself and do it I would give a substantial sum to tzedaka! After a while and working on being very determined I did it less and less often. Firstly, It was becoming very expensive, as I was keeping to my end  of the deal and giving the tzedaka! I could'nt afford to do it! After a while this kept me in line and helped me to cool off a bit, and that allowed me to focus on strengthening my self control. Eventually, with tremendous help from above I was succesful. It is now almost 8 years later and I have thank G-d been in control of myself!  It is very possible to do , dont let the wicked yetzer horah tell you otherwise. I was hooked to online porn and even just any visual stimualtion was enough to get me crazy. Plus unfortunately, I had been involved with guys too and that turn on made me crazy and made things double as hard to overecome!!

You can take control. It is exceedingly possible! I am living proof 8+ years in the making. I still live with the fear of messing up and I pray for help everyday. But my battle is from a different angle now. YOU CAN Do IT!! I have and you can too! 

sufferyisroel,

wow, 8+ years is a looong time, and you inspire us all to aspire to greatness.

you wrote


Indeed, as Chazal say "Al taamin B'Atzm'cha Ad Yom Mosecha- do not trust yourself until your dying day". Precisely because you live with the fear of messing up is why you pray daily. And precisely because you are aware of your weakness, even almost a decade later, is why you pray and why you have been granted the strength to persevere!!!

Hashem is awesome!!!

Chazak V'Ematz!

There's a story in the Gemara (Kedushin 81b) about Rav Chiyah Bar Ashi who was already old and he had already stopped having relations with his wife for years because he was old and week, and yet he would fall on his face and pray that Hashem save him from the Yetzer Hara. One day his wife heard him pray thus, and she couldn't understand why he needed to pray for this even though he was old and weak. And so one day she dressed up as the town harlot and passed by him and temted him to sin, and he didn't know it was his wife and he couldn't hold back and "sinned" with her. Afterwards, he wanted to kill himself for having fallen and he sat inside the oven to burn himself to death to atone for his sin. And his wife found him there and asked him what he was doing in there. And he told her what had happened and refused to come out. So she admitted to him that it was her and finally after proving it to him, she convinced him to come out. Yet even though he realized he hadn't really sinned, he still fasted for the rest of his life still because of the "thought" he had to sin.

We see from this story how we must always daven to Hashem to save us from being tested. Even this great Tzadik, who was already old and weak and greatly removed from this, still felt the need to fall on his face and daven every day for Hashem to save him!

Hi

Like you, I am a greatful recoveing sex-addict.

Giving tzdaka, fasting, praying, tikunim, learning, etc. I did it all but nothing helped untill I realized that I am sick (ein adom chote eloh eim kain necnes bo ruach shtus) porn, masturbation, cybersex, prostitution, etc. are all a mental obsession which I got my self into it and once hooked can not stop, as chazal say "aad she'naase olov melech". This is the job of the yetzer hora to get people hooked so he ownes them for life...

Giving Tzedaka while not realizing that it is Hashem who helps not the zechusim is like a toyval v'sheretz byado. A person must know that nothing, absalutly nothing happens without Hashem. He enabled us to get into this by giving us the bechirah and he can take us out of this.

The only option is prayer, davening, davening, and davening. Also, all of us have may things that can trigger us like people things and pleaces. We must know it by heart and ask hashem for help to avoid these things at any cost, otherwise our life is in danger. If does not no matter how much tzedaka you give, one day you will be back out there and go down the scale so fast you could never imagine...

bgsa,

Would love to hear more of your story. What made you decide to start turning your life around? etc.

Chazak V'Ematz!

Beautiful post bsga, and good points! We need more of you on this forum...