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hi 15 Aug 2010 19:29 #76559

  • quiet
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Last Edit: 13 Apr 2011 16:15 by .

Re: hi 15 Aug 2010 23:10 #76574

  • kedusha
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Welcome, Anon!  You're doing the right thing to post - it's when we stay inside our own head that we're in the greatest danger of slipping and falling.

(I removed some of the potentially triggering words from your post, since we're dealing with a somewhat sensitive crowd! )


Just as an alcoholic needs to avoid that first sip, a lust addict needs to avoid that first slip.Slip today? No way! ;)Fall today? No way, Jose'!
Last Edit: 15 Aug 2010 23:15 by .

Re: hi 16 Aug 2010 12:18 #76588

  • kollel guy
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Hey there, welcome to the club!
I can very much relate to your inclination not to 'personally' have any thing to do with discussions or group work with these things, I totally used to be like that, and still am in some ways. But once you post a few times, or answer someone elses question which you can help them with - you'll see it's really not so bad.
Really, you gotta just jump in and get involved. Do you want to be stuck with this forever c"v? Besides, c'mon nobody has a clue who you are.
Also, I highly doubt you really recognized the voice. It was probably just your imagination. Even so, you don't have to talk if your still worried.
All said, go start a thread in the wall of honor about yourself, and keep updating it every day or so. You'll lose the fear real quick that way.
Hatzlacha!
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Re: hi 16 Aug 2010 14:10 #76597

  • Ineedhelp!!
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Hey anongye,

We all certainly can relate to what you are going through. We all want that pleasure that we cannot have. But when I think about it, its not the pleasure that I seek when I lust. Its oblivion. I literally faze while using my drug. Lust is but a symptom of deeper issues that lurk inside me.

Welcome to GYE!

-Yiddle
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Anonymity Vs Recovery 16 Aug 2010 19:47 #76634

What are you afraid that person will do if he recognizes your voice?  After all, he's struggling with this also, so you two are in the same boat.  I once walked into an SA meeting and my best friend was there.  It was shocking at first, but it added such a layer of depth to our relationship that it was as if we were getting to know each other for the first time.  Not only that, but my wife ended up talking to his wife about it and really helped his wife out a lot.  Also, I've known Duvid Chaim for years and had no idea that he had this problem.  When I heard he was leading this call, I called him up and said "David, this is Daniel ------, I just want to let you know that I am also a sexaholic and wanted to ask permission to join your call.  I don't want you to feel uncomfortable."  Now we have a REAL relationship, whereas before we didnt even really know each other.  So, I hate giving advice, but maybe you should send Duvid an email duvidchaim@gmail.com and voice your concern to him and listen to what he says.  Or just think about it seriously yourself.  By keeping your anonymity, you might be jeopardizing your recovery.  Is it really worth it?  Nothing we say is allowed to leave the line anyways, and if you want you can call this guy and tell him how important it is that he doesn't tell anyone you're on the line.  I'm sure he will respect your wishes, as his anonymity can also be jeopardized now that you know who he is.  After all, this is pekuach nefesh.  This disease emotionally and spiritually kills is and threatens to take away everything we hold dear.  And unfortunately, without recovery it only gets worse.  It might be worth it.  Not to mention, that many people get found out sooner or later, whether it's by their wife, their boss, or other members of the community.  Better that this guy, a fellow sexaholic, should find out than any one of those.  Kal Tuv.
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Re: hi 16 Aug 2010 20:06 #76638

  • Yosef Hatzadik
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I share in the fear of having my voice recognized.

I have no qualms about being open with others who are really committed members of our great GYE Community. It is those silent visitors who just pop in to browes & then decide that they are soooo disgusting. They do not neeeed this kind of help. (They may be right or wrong. It is irrelevant.) they are the ones by whom I am afraid of having my voice recognized.

I have no qualms with speaking with anyone here 1-on-1. I don't have that fear in the written posts. It is on the group calls, when there are more participants than names on the 'check in roster' that I hesitate to speak up.
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Re: hi 16 Feb 2021 05:32 #363466

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