I do not know why you deleted your post. I thought your daughter's essay would be helpful for people . . . I just drove carpool and was sorry to see that the post was gone when I returned.  I was going to post earlier, but I am not sure I had the right words to say.

In regard to my removed posting (if you saw it while it was here briefly):

I was advised by the moderators that this posting was probably not a good idea, so I removed it.

If anyone wants to talk to me about it via PM, I am open to that

Thanks again

Dear Shmendrik, I was sent your post by a moderator.

I commend you for your honesty and for your desire to face up to this past issue. Your story is just another example of how dangerous lust addiction is....

While you may not be able to go to a therapist, you CAN go to a SA group. There you can share your story with a sponsor, and with others you will become close to and trust. There are unfortunately many such cases in the SA groups, and although they don't share their stories with everyone, they do share with those they can trust. Also, you will gain more from the SA group and through working the 12-Steps than you would from therapy.

Thanks, Guard

i will try to follow up on your advice.

Yasher Koach on everything

Shmendrick

guardureyes wrote on 30 Oct 2010 18:29:


Shmen.  I'm a therapist.  I had thirty years of therapy.  tsi'gournisht helfin.  Only this site, the work I do related to it, and Hashem's chain has helped

Shmen, I am so glad you're back.  I don't know what the issues are, and I don't care.  i'm here for you in any way I can be a help.

1daat

1daat,

I agree 1000%. I'll just add that Guard's stressed the 12 Step Program. Shmen's in it, and he's growing in leaps and bounds. I hear his voice on the phone, and I can tell. I love this site, and even tho I havent had time to post much on my own these days, I owe GYE and the forum my life. If you can additionally join one of the Anonymous Phone conferences and stay with the program "1daat" and EVERY day, you too could grow and become Free from lust in ways you never imagined.

kol tuv, KOT and KUTGW,

Steve

Steve wrote on 01 Nov 2010 14:45:


In this particular case, Guard was recommending live groups.  The phone groups are the next best thing, but they are not always enough.

Kedusha,

Yes, SA live groups are VERY helpful, and become a strong lifeline to Sobriety, and i recommend them highly. We have, however, heard from many in the chevra that SOME SA groups don't really work the Steps in the literal sense. There are those who have gone to SA groups for years and have a strong measure of sobriety, but have never gained the level of FREEDOM that RECOVERY offers, cuz they weren't big Book Purists in following the steps. If the SA groups one can join are not really working the steps, I suggest the phone group should be joined ALONG WITH participation in a live group. Working the Steps is key.

Shmen, sorry if we're hijacking here, but it's all in your gevaldige zechus.

Love ya,

Steve

Steve,

In other words, someone who needs a live group (because of the added accountability provided, or for whatever reason) can continue to benefit from the phone groups as well.

Maskim!

There are no Shnei kesuvim hamakchishim zeh ess zeh



So, I guess, all the kasuv hashlishis should stay away!  (I will maintain my silence.)  :-X

Help!!!    I've been hijacked!!!!

Actually, much better to be hijacked by you guys -- the yetzer Hara still thinks he still has me, as he has for decades,  and wants to negotiate for my release!  He is teasing me -- I thought he was willing to just let me go - but here he decided to put up a wole new fight that I never in my life thought I would have to deal with  :-[ --- ah well.

I don't know where SA groups are in my area, or how to acces them, or, given the sensitive nature of my deleted posting, I can or should risk going to them, so it is encouraging to hear that I might be able to deal with this here instead.    But as it seems that some people feel it is necessary, I will make inquiries. (I know this is annoying for those who did not read my posting, -- my apologies.)

Thanks 1daat, Steve, Kedusha, Yosef, anongye, jip, and of course guard . . . you guys are the best.  I look forward to freedom, but it seems that it takes more than the truth to set one free - it takes working the steps.  ???

(I know, I know, you can only get to the truth by working the steps -- Kasuv hashlishi).

And Steve, I'll bite.  what the heck are KOT and KUTGW ?

Best to all,

Shmendrick

Keep on Trucking!!!!


Keep up the good work!!!





Does it better when it is moving...

I couldn't make it too easy 

Maybe Dov can help you find an SA group near where you live.

See SA in NYC's Webpage

Hi Shmendrink,

I'm not sure whom you can contact, but obvious choices are to find a FRUM men-only SA group, or one that will have non-jews, preferably all men. The Boros are big enough that you should have your pick. Perhaps you can open a discussion here on advantages to both types of groups that GYE members have experienced. Hear what might work best for you, and aim for it. You could also send out this inquiry to the Group Roster which you are a member of, and please let us all see the feedback for our own struggles also.

Remember, Hashem sometimes waits for us to jump before he spreads out the net to catch us. LGNLGD!*

*Let Go N' Let GD