today i fell again

Welcome laughingman !

Your name laughingman reminds me of our forefather Yitzchok, who represented gevura (strength) and was called a name from the root of laughter.

On Pesach we leave the 49th level of Tumah (impurity), and the climb to Shavuos (which Reb Nachman teaches is the tikkun for destructive sexual desires) has begun. I think Shavuous also corresponds to Yitzchok. So please join us as we climb the mountain !

welcome and have a lichaim (wine of course, its pesach) many of us fell today. can you tell us if you held out at all before you fell?

laughingman wrote on 02 Apr 2010 14:24:


Welcome back, laughingman. I recognize you from somewhere  

Your new name is very good. Simcha is a big key to breaking free. But how can be be'Simcha even at times where we feel no desire to stay clean and no motivation to serve Hashem?

Here's something I saw in a Chassidishe Sefer once. The simple fact that we know that there's a G-d in the world is alone a reason to rejoice, even if we are in a situation of apathy and feel no desire to serve Him. And here's a parable he writes: Imagine the king came to a small town in his kingdom, but he wanted his presence to remain secret. Only a select group of people were told that he was in town, and even fewer were asked to actually come and serve him. So if you were from those select people who were told that he is in town, surely you would still rejoice, even if you weren't from those who were chosen to serve him...

The same applies to our situation. From the billions of people in the world, how many are zoche to know that there is a king in the world? That alone is a big reason to rejoice, even if we were not yet given "permission" from above, so to speak, to be allowed in to serve Him. :D

BTW. What was your longest streak clean? How did you do it? And what tools of the handbooks/GYE have you tried already?

of course i held out pretty well too

i dont fall as far anymore even when i do fall

im still falling here and there still climbing

keep up the good work!

Reb laughing, hope things go well on ur end, this week is 1st week of pirkei avos , a time to work on ourself

2 things 1 i made it too expensive for me to fall

2 how do i switch over to the married ppl forum

bonus thanks guy for reminding me pirkei avos !!

and incidently the omer

Email Guard and ask him to give you access to the married forum.

Rock on!

in the last couple of weeks i have had a pretty fast roller coaster ride life wise and i have been likewise having a roller coaster ride shmira wise

i have ben keeping with a certain vow i have made (not a realvow vow but you know ) and in as much as one of my past transgressions has so far been completely submerged the other part of that the not looking at certain things etc part has been on/off in spite of an obvious ongoing effort by G-d to control me by making me have no time for this wrong indulgience or by making it super embaressing to indulge at the moment

as i have said before i have begun to make it very expensive for myself to continue in this issue and because i believe strongly that tzedakah in direction A will cure illness A so for the last few weeks i have been giving to tzedaka against this problem

also i have told myself that even if i must indulge i must do so "beshinui" to make it less interesting for me


does anyone know how to use the restriceted sites system on internet explorer btw i cant use k9 ......last time i did it locked me out of the net nearly permanantly


will post more soon     

I suggest making your red-line "no images". If you have to act out, let it be without any external stimulation. This will make it less tempting and you'll fall less... Do that for 90 days and then we'll see about the next step.

See our filter page for many great filter options.

Also, I suggest committing to $50 for each fall. That should be much more powerful!  :D