Hi!
This is my first visit to the forums and my first post. However, I have been getting the daily emails for a few months by now and they were a tremendous Chizuk for me. I must say that since I started reading them first thing in the morning, my whole day was better. I even started sharing some of the nice thoughts with my wife after work. She asked me where do you pick up these nice Vertlech lately and I told her that I signed up for the GYE chizuk list!
Let me introduce myself if I may. I am a regular heimishe guy with a lovely wife and a nice family B”H. It is hard for me to relate to some of the stuff on GYE because they seem too strong for me. I feel that there is a much needed section missing in GYE and that is just simple chizuk for שמירת עינים for us regular folks who don’t have an addiction (yet…). However, since I can relate very much to a 12 step program having seen how it turned around lives for close friends who suffered for years from other addictions (alcoholism, etc), I do relate to your great work you do. Please keep it up.
Here is what works for me. Today, we don’t have a Beis Hamkidush. So חז"ל told us that when we daven, it is in place of the קרבנות that we used to be מקריב in the holy temple. In other words, a Davening with כוונה is just as holy to Hashem since we can’t be מקריב a קרבן now days. When I walk on the street and I come across something indecent (a billboard, immodest woman, etc) and I feel it is hard for me not to look, I just say Hashem, this is very hard for me. But I will hold myself back and keep my eyes holy for you and please accept it as a קרבן.
Here is something else we should all know. Some people think that looking at p*** is a big עבירה but looking at images that for the אומת העולם is considered ok is not a sin. They don’t think it is a big deal. It is. Our holy Torah says ולא תתורו אחרי לבבכם ואחרי עיניכם. The Torah does not give ratings. PG17 is fine but if you are yeshivish than stay away from PG18 and if you are orthodox than stay away from PG21. No… If it is lust, it is a sin.
Internet filter:
This is a must. It is not the perfect solution since you can still see many stuff that are not… lets just say you would be ashamed to look at them in your shul בין גברא לגברא. It is more in the בחינה of בוחר הרע במיעוטו.
Internet accountability:
Get one of these filters that also sends a daily report by email on all the sites you visited. This will not only help you not to stray away, IT WILL MAKE YOU FAR MORE PRODUCTIVE IN YOUR WORK! You will be able to get much more work done.
Again, please if possible devote a new section for simple chizuk in עניני קדושה for people who are not addicts and don’t need a 12 step program but of course like all of us need chizuk daily.
May Hashem bless all your great work and together בדיבוק חברים may we all merit to keep ourselves and family hold and hasten the coming of Machicah.