This Tiver is absolutely unstoppable. I don’t see any hope. Every time I think about it, all I feel is despair. I can’t imagine ever not being addicted.

Hi brother!! welcome to a place where you realize that anything's possible and that your not beyond hope ...many of us have been in similar places as u ,and felt totally alone and despaired of every getting out the the black hole we were trapped in.
  read around the forums it helped me a lot.
  Hazlacha rabah!! Stay strong!!

We all felt that way. and its prob impossible if you do it alone but with hashems help and guidance from the amazing guys here anything is possible.
Just to be clear I said the same exact words for the last 13 years of my life I could hardly go 3 days without it and when I had extreme will power maybe a week+. But since ive reached out to a mentor 53 days ago Im clean from P completely and had 1 fall to M after 14 days but Bh im clean since and tom will be day 40 be"h . Dont get me wrong its hard like hell and im not fooling myself im still battling for my life but I have done something that I believed impossible and so can you!!!
Hatzlacha!

100%, i have been struggling for yrs and tried fixing it myself but somehow you need help from the experts and its just amazing how far you get with the right help and chizuk

I feel the same way. I have to keep thinking about how I feel after in order for me to stop this taiva. 

focus on the goal. The goal is to be free from these shackles. Get very good at cutting anything out that threatens this goal. 

Do you have positive avodas Hashem in your day? If not how can you? If yes how can you make it better? One thing that helped me a lot was a talk with vehkam around a month ago, encouraging me I’ve gotta be solidly grounded. It can’t be a focus on sur merah. The more connected to Hashem and His Torah one gets, it gets easier to naturally rid one’s self of the yetzers shackles

Ay, it makes me so sad seeing your pain. Especially since I know that you really CAN get past these challenges! 
My friend, stick around, read, ask, listen, and when you're ready, connect to the oilam here. It really works
Looking forward to seeing your chag hageula!