I definitely hear your struggle about not getting complacent (something that I struggle with too). posting and being open is a good way to combat that. the need of self improvement never goes away and daily we need to be better then the day before which we accomplish by being on the forum and interacting with others fight the same fight that we are.

Thank you everyone for your warm responses! and btw thank you also to everyone that drops a thank you, it's very encouraging! so bh today is day 36!!!! bh doing good, just gonna share that for certain reasons my mind and brain space is occupied with things that are going on in my life, and i also am little busy with certain stuff... i therefor am less consistent with my schedule and feel a little bit like jello (take it as you want!), so bh i'm still doing ok although i will say that there was a certain feeling that came up that i should maybe just look around at certain lustfull sites online... but bh i'm not doing that!!!!!!! and i think i'm ok!

Will also share that i also had a certain stressful situation that came up today (conflict between wife and mother, nothing too major but still, it's the type of things that come up by us every once in a while........) but bh i stood behind my wife and she really appreciated it, (in the past she felt like i was pressuring her to much because i wanted to satisfy my mother.... and bh my mother also came around, thank you hashem!!

Hatzlocha from the mir! and have a wonderful shabbos!

bh day 38! and that is awesome!!!!!! ah guttel lichtigeh voch to us all!

Ah Gutteh Gezunte Kedushedika Voch to you and all!! 

Just honestly curious: referencing your previous post- was there a connection between the stressful situation you mentioned (that BH worked out well) and the stirring of urges that you felt? 

chaimoigen wrote on 26 Jan 2025 04:05:

Hi r' chaim! thanx for caring about my growth! and for bringing out that tzad, i guess it's hard to honestly know..... but i would assume that it couldv'e been connected to that as well as other stuff that are still on going, but to be truthful i think that really anything even if it was a little thing could make my mind wanna go on vacation to lust world, but yes it would be beneficial to try to learn myself and my triggers a little better.

I will share something that happened tonight a few hours ago i got into a argument with my wife, (which bh doesn't happen that often!, and i actually ironically think it's a little bit of a good sign, shows there's some connection happening), and i feel like i behaved like a little baby, although i really think that there is a point that i have as well.... (whatever but i think it helps to share, i wish i would be able to share the details as well {not that exciting!} but i can't), so i realized right after, that in the past when such a thing would happen i would have immediately gone to act out (i'll leave it to the mavinim to explain that), but bh i am not doing that! and i don't even want to!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! but at the same time i think it would be best for me and for her if i apologize tonight and move on, but i have such a hard time doing these type of things, (i think because of my lack of self esteem type of thing, that i can't get myself to admit to doing something wrong, but hopefully the more comfortable i get with myself and the more accepting i am, than it will become easier as i know that noone is perfect and messing up a little doesn't have to define me, and in actuality is healthy and normal, and really it would be better for me... whatever hope u get the gist of it, and it's good for me to get this out of my system, but hey words are cheap let's see if i can follow through with some action!

On a happier note today is day 40!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hatzlocha from the mir!

Hello chevra! bh as a follow up i did apologize to my wife! and it went over very well! wish i couldv'e always been like this!
either way bh day 42! hatzlocha raba from the mir!

altehmirrer wrote on 30 Jan 2025 05:26:

Kol HaKavod!! 

It’s crazy but apologizing almost always works out much better than not apologizing….

A Guy Who Know What It Feel Like To Need To Aplogize A Lot. 

Ah my tayeraeh yesid fund the mir . Ah shud you don't come say hi as I'm in the next door town in slutks (aka bmg).  Yes your saying eisen always notice a pattern of Shalom bayis issues and acting out.