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Yelling into the Void
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TOPIC: Yelling into the Void 155 Views

Yelling into the Void 14 Nov 2024 23:16 #425129

  • DEW20227
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Hey all, been a bit since I was last here; like around 2ish years almost. But thought I would jump back in and see how this is going.

I have mostly had issues with being gay from time to time, but I am at the point in my life where this is who I am. I am a gay Jew. I am a human being. I have feelings. I am also imperfect, as I am human. I am not looking for reminders that this is an aveira, to be gay. As if we all are absolved from doing averias. But this is my getting this off of my chest.

I am gay. I am a Jew.

Re: Yelling into the Void 14 Nov 2024 23:25 #425130

  • onelookless
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hi welcome brother

its big step to open up, to saying the true,
its a step forward in the right direction

keep up, you will get to an good end, you never think you will get

Re: Yelling into the Void 15 Nov 2024 00:01 #425134

  • cande
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DEW20227 wrote on 14 Nov 2024 23:16:
Hey all, been a bit since I was last here; like around 2ish years almost. But thought I would jump back in and see how this is going.

I have mostly had issues with being gay from time to time, but I am at the point in my life where this is who I am. I am a gay Jew. I am a human being. I have feelings. I am also imperfect, as I am human. I am not looking for reminders that this is an aveira, to be gay. As if we all are absolved from doing averias. But this is my getting this off of my chest.

I am gay. I am a Jew.

do you mean you do משכב זכר? if not you might not be gay,
unless you insist on being GAY.

who told you its aveira to GAY?

love you bro
cande'
Last Edit: 15 Nov 2024 00:15 by cande.

Re: Yelling into the Void 15 Nov 2024 00:10 #425135

if someone doesn't has feelings to women only to men, but never have done משכב זכר is he not gay?

Re: Yelling into the Void 15 Nov 2024 00:21 #425137

  • amevakesh
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Hello brother. I take issue with what you wrote. It's definitely NOT an Aveira to be gay. If you were born with a pull to these desires, or even if you developed these tendencies later on in your life, that's not your fault in any way shape or form. It's a Nisayon that Hashem gave you for reasons we don't know while we're on this world. Why he chose you specifically for this test is beyond our understanding. You might be a Tzaddik of the greatest Madreiga, and are in a place that many of us can't even fathom. To have urges that there's no kosher outlet for, and still succeed fighting to stay clean is worthy of everyone's absolute admiration. Even if you've fallen on occasion, but are seeking help in trying to extricate yourself from acting out, you're still a fighter in Hashem's army.  Accordingly, you will find acceptance, compassion and understanding here more than anywhere else.

However if you mean that you're acting on those desires, and have accepted that it's okay to act on them, and are seeking validation for that, please be informed that we assume that people here accept what the Torah says to be absolute and the Torah calls these acts תועבה an abomination. There can and will not be any sympathy for someone who says that the act is okay, it's not something we condone, nor is it acceptable to validate.  I'm assuming that you're part of the first group that has accepted your urges, and you're embracing the fight which is nothing short of heroic. It's the act that's an abomination, not ח"ו the person with urges toward it. As such, welcome dear brother to the forums and Hatzlacha on your journey.
Feel free to email me at amevakesh23@gmail.com

Re: Yelling into the Void 15 Nov 2024 11:26 #425162

DEW20227 wrote on 14 Nov 2024 23:16:
Hey all, been a bit since I was last here; like around 2ish years almost. But thought I would jump back in and see how this is going.

I have mostly had issues with being gay from time to time, but I am at the point in my life where this is who I am. I am a gay Jew. I am a human being. I have feelings. I am also imperfect, as I am human. I am not looking for reminders that this is an aveira, to be gay. As if we all are absolved from doing averias. But this is my getting this off of my chest.

I am gay. I am a Jew.

Hey bro I would imagine you didn't just post this just to put it out there, rather you deep down want out. I admire you for taking this step! Though I can't relate to your struggle, I can at least say that it pains me to hear another jew is having this struggle. I feel for you and wish you the greatest of luck getting back to what you really want to be.

PS I don't know what you've tried already but I believe many times these struggles can be related to childhood experiences etc. and there are therapist who specialize in this inyan.

Hatzlacha Raba.
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