Hi everyone,
Getting alot of chizuk from reading these posts and seeing there is a whole community of Jewish Men here to be honest about their challenges and growth and support each other.
I've been very down since I am a mashgiach for bochurim, married a few years, looked up to by many, and recently have been falling and feeling as if I am back to where I was as a bochur plus all the added guilt of secretly letting down my wife, children, and bochurim. I felt I had no one to turn to, since I'm too embarrassed to speak to my regular mentor. I mustered up the courage to mention it to him a few months ago, and I'm just too ashamed to let him know again that I'm still falling. Its a cycle of course, since I don't have his support, I fall even more, in this and other areas. 
I was trying to think who I could confide in, and then I remembered GYE. My wife would be horrified if she knew. B"H I haven't been looking at actual porn recently, but my taaiva is to read explicit content. I'm looking to stay consistent with this and tell my mentor about my successs. Would love any feedback and advice. 

There are two types of people, those who have struggles and those who deny it.
All wives would be horrified & shocked if they knew what their husbands struggle with. 
Stick around here post your successes and CH'v Your slips - Bezh you will end up stronger for the struggle

As a side point I am having a hard time wrapping my mind around a Frank Lee doppelganger
What's next a second cordnoy?

Welcome, Welcome!

GYE is a great place. Lots of people to connect with, please hang around, read, ask, learn and grow.

Its very courageous of you for coming into this site, let’s do this together.

As a side point, redfaced your funny.

frank lee wrote on 28 Jan 2024 23:56:

welcome aboard, were here with you.

if you can muster the courage to speak to your mentor, that would be a huge thing and really worth the effort and difficulty.
i feel that for me one of the biggest help for me was the speaking to some live people, they were very understanding and sympathetic but it also really created a cemented picture of what i am doing and just some "other side" i wipe away the next morning/afternoon/evening when i rejoin normal society.
it also made a seriousness about actual change, not just wanting to stop.

but if you dont feel ready for that we'er still here for some virtual support 

hatzlacha Rabbah

frank lee wrote on 28 Jan 2024 23:56:

Kol hakavod that you opened your own thread and started sharing! We've seen some very insightful responses from on other threads, so it's great get to know you and here about your battles.
As one who is also in chinuch, I can very much relate to the feelings that you shared.
Keep posting, we're in this together!

First off, You came to the right place. The help and love you need to fight this problem is right here at your fingertips. Just keep coming back following the program, and you already took a massive step by opening up in the forum... I do have to ask, is this a NEW Frank Lee or did Frank.Lee open a new account? It doesn't matter, just wondering.

Best of luck, you can do this!!

Hey, I don’t know what ur situation is, and im not even married but I am going out with somone and planning on getting married to her, and I know that with this kind of thing we have to be transparent about it with our, spouses so we aren’t going thru these things together

I respect the courage it must have taken to face up to yourself in your situation, kol hakavod and welcome on board.

Welcome! Try strengthening yourself with these great free resources:

1) The Battle of the Generation: a sensational free ebook that seriously gets you excited to fight and win this fight. It's a real game-changer.

2) The Fight: an incredible audio series from Rabbi Shafier.

Links are below in my signature.
Wishing you much success!

Welcome and kol hakavod! habo l'taher msayin osoi!

I too am a mashpia and would be mortified if those who look up to me found out about my past. There are others in the same boat in this forum. I'll give you one perspective; after overcoming this evil, you'll be in a much better place to help guide those that look up to you. The ikar is to be in the fight and not meyuash, by being here you clearly are coming to fight.
The oilam here is very accepting and supportive. Take advantage of it.

You should have much hatzlach!

frank lee wrote on 28 Jan 2024 23:56:

Welcome, Thank you for the honesty. Your not alone in this struggle, I personally know another “ Mashgiach” that struggled as well. Keep on posting, you will get to great places