I guess for an introduction I should just say it all. At the end of 6th grade on erev shavous I was trying to nap for shavous when I discovered הז"ל for the first time. For about a year I was in denial before admitting to myself this was הז"ל (at the time I don't know that name and only knew it was something "אסור". At first it started with normal non-jewish book material but when I got to 8th grade it developed to worse literature. The all time low was during covid when I discovered videos. While since then the only device I have access to (on off-shabbosim) is filtered with Techloq for some reason it didn't block a certain site. But the worst problem is at yeshiva I've got really close to "breaking out" with the same story of a week or two (I once even got to close to a month) of being clean followed by a single fall or a dirtier trick of the y"h, a "ספיק" fall which knocks out the whole thing (I know I should "keep on going" but l'maasa it fizzles). Also because I'm at yeshiva I can't really access any gye stuff except for the hotline which is a double edged sword because access to gye means access to other things. Any tips or advice would be helpful. 

Welcome!!
you're in the right place! 
about not having access, try reaching out to some people here, i would suggest hashemhelpme. Good luck

Welcome! Try strengthening yourself with these great free resources:1) The Battle of the Generation: a sensational free ebook that seriously gets you excited to fight and win this fight. It's a real game-changer.
2) The Fight: an incredible audio series from Rabbi Shafier.
Links are below in my signature. Wishing you much success!

seltzer wrote on 07 Jan 2024 06:26:

Welcome to GYE.
You seem to be a normal human being with normal struggles. 
You need to realize that you are NOT alone! We are living in extremely challenging times and many people are struggling like you. At the same time many have also recovered and so will you with Hashem's help.

Many people struggle with lust on some level, and a high percentage have stumbled in these areas as well.
Even Tzadikim of previous generations struggled in this area (as they mention “the sins of their youth”), so you can imagine that those who seek purity in a generation such as ours are truly from Hashem’s greatest warriors!

The biggest obstacle to succeeding is not believing you can succeed. The first impediment to overcoming this struggle is not in your genes, your childhood or your environment. If you believe you can succeed and are willing to make the effort, you will find the way out. Absolutely NOTHING stands in the way of a true RATZON.

You can read the recovery stories on our site to see that many people even worse off than you have successfully broken free of these behaviors. We must truly want to break free of this Mitzrayim. Chazal say that those who didn’t want to leave Mitzrayim died in the plague of darkness. Already at the outset of our journey, we must be determined that we will never give up and always keep trying, no matter what. R' Tzadok HaKohen of Lublin writes (Tzidkas Hatzadik 154): "Just as one must believe in Hashem, so too, one must believe in himself!" Hashem wants us to BELIEVE in our strengths, our capabilities, and in our ability to overcome evil and achieve greatness. Although we might feel stuck, determination is completely up to us. The trick to ultimate success is only to want enough.

Here is something great to read (if you haven't read it yet) guardyoureyes.com/ebooks/item/bochur-to-bochur 

Please stay connected and share your great progress so other's can get encouragement from you as well!

Hi
Welcome!

Sorry to hear, sounds familiar.

Make some friends who you will be able to stay in touch on the phone.

Ah! A teire Yiddishe neshama, wants to be pure and holy, longs to be close to his Creator! So beautiful! My friend, reach out to HHM, michelgelner@gmail.com. If you don't get through right away, don't worry. The line is pashut busy with other people being helped. And when you get through you'll be very thankful you called. Keep in touch. Please let us know how you are doing