frank.lee wrote on 10 May 2023 19:07:
Sorry to hear. I've been there. It means you still have a purpose in life, still have bechira. Still can win over your challenges!
Very true. I heard something similar from a friend of mine, who is a doctor and a Baal Teshuva. When he was becoming frum, someone brought him to meet R' Avrohom Schorr Shlit"a and he asked him: Why can't I keep my passion going? I get so excited about learning and Mitzvos for a while, and then it just fizzles out and I lose that Cheishek. Rav Schorr answered him: "As a doctor, you certainly know what an EKG looks like. It's basically a line that goes up and down across the length of the chart. What does it mean if the line is flat, straight across?" So the doctor answers: "It means he's dead." So Rav Schorr continues, "Same thing in Yiddishkeit. If it's a straight line, then there's no life. If a person has constant ups and downs, better days and worse days, that's a sign that he's alive."