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TOPIC: making progress 251 Views

making progress 09 Jun 2020 14:24 #350962

  • bjo
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Hello everyone. This is my first time posting. I am 23 years old. I have been struggling with a mild form of pornography addiction and masturbation for a couple of years. In the past, I was able to go a couple of weeks without looking at pornography or masturbating, and then I would get triggered and give in. Last month, I had one really bad week where I gave in to my urges more than usual. It was then that I knew I had to take action. That is what inspired me to come to GYE. 

I am making progress. The first week since I came here, it was very easy not to get triggered because I knew I made a commitment that was still fresh in my memory. The second week was a little more difficult yet manageable. There were some close calls and I sometimes had thoughts that I wish I wouldn't have, but I completed week 2 without giving in.

After 12 days without pornography or masturbation, I had an involuntary nocturnal emission, which likely happened as a result of thoughts I had while I was sleeping. I don't believe I ever experienced this before, and I felt bad that this happened. I know that it is less bad than being "motzi zera levatala", but I was worried that this episode would impede the progress I have been making. Since then, I have managed to ignore temptations, but my thoughts have gotten a little more intense. 

Re: making progress 09 Jun 2020 18:52 #350974

  • plz hashem
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in regards to the "involuntary nocturnal emission"
i have the same exact thing. (just had this again last night). and i have the same feelings about it.
but, they say its a "withdrawal symptom", so you really shouldn't be worried about it at all. and on a practical note, the worries are probably just the atzas hayetzer to get you. (Also the Tzemach Tzedek of Lubavitch writes that being concerned about a Keri makes it more likely to happen).

keep up the great work!
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