hello I live in London, UK. I have been going through a huge long struggle and I really need help. I have been masturbating and viewing pornography for the best part of two decades. I have been wanting to stop for moral as well as religious reasons. I can sometimes go through periods of not doing it but the temptation always comes back and gets the better of me. I am 37 years old and been trying to get married for around 15 years. There is no excuse for what I do, but the struggle and lack of success makes it that much harder to get over my porn addiction. I find if I date someone, once a girl dumps me (which happens quite often) I go straight back to viewing pornography.

it has taken me a long time to realise this, but given the fact I have been doing this for so long, I now see it is almost impossible for me to stop without help.

welcome! Baruch Hashem you found this site! im sure things are going to turn around slowly but surely ,keep on posting andtry out the gye handbook its a real powerhouse of help with this issue,hatzlacha , and may you find your basherta in the right time!

Thank you for your kind words.

Hatzlacha,
Best of luck. 

Welcome. It should be with hatzlocha. Many of us here went through what you describe and BH got better. Stay connected and iyh you will do well too. There are alot of suceessful members in the UK. If you are willing to meet, they will give you the opportunity to meet real people who have graduated and help you realize you can do it too.

Thank you very much. Best of luck to you too and well done on your current streak. Keep it up.

Nu?? How u been?

Doing ok thanks.  How about you?

Ups and downs, u can check my thread...

Perhaps u can share with us what has worked for u?

I wish you lots of hatzlacha.

Happy to share things I find helpful, but I am sure other people have better ideas.

I try to think about my family.  I find watching the daily chizuk broadcast helpful and inspirational.  Every so often I learn a few mishnayos on the following website:

www.sefaria.org

I have used the internet for a lot of bad over the years.  Doing a mishna takes my mind away from negative websites and makes me feel I am using the internet for something good.

Barnetfc1 wrote on 20 Dec 2020 12:45:

Interesting, thanks! Much appreciated.

Is there any way in which we can help you in your situation? Anything particular ur struggling with that we can help out?

That is very kind of you to ask.  If I think of anything I will let you know.

I would like to get married and that has been a real struggle.  If you know of anything I can do I will be happy to hear.

Barnetfc1 wrote on 20 Dec 2020 17:30:

I hear that, that makes things much harder...
Ill be in shidduchim prob in a year, so that’s why I’m dealing with all this now...

Hatzlocha! Keep in touch

Have you spoken to any of the guys here? Like HaShem Help Me or Dov?

I have spoken to hashem help me but that was a while ago.  He is very good.  Not spoken to Dov.  Do you think I should speak to him?  If so, can you put me in touch with him.