Hi,

I saw a sign for this website in my Shul a while ago, and a few days ago, got the courage to actually read the sign! Then, today, after some not-so-nice viewing, decided to come to this site. I've been reading through some of the stuff here.

It all started about 10 years ago. Yikes! Some friends made fun of me, etc. Then the store nearby had some magazines. To this day, I'm embarrassed that the Pakistani guy saw me reading porn magazines in the front of the store. Ahhh... teenagers. The truth is, even though I'm not a teenager any more (in 20's), maybe I'm a little more aware of my surroundings, but nothing's changed.

I work on the web, and as a result, am on all the time, and know enough to bypass (almost) all blocks. In fact, I saw a page FULL of ways to get around eBlaster. I can list 4 or 5 off the top of my head.

Sorry for the rambling, it's just that I've never talked about this to anyone, and this is the first time I am doing this.

My sincere hope is that this site will help me, and not turn me off from being helped.

You are still very young (don't worry I am your age too) and have a full life ahead of you, lucky for you that you found this site at such a young age I bet there are members here who would have loved to find this site earlier.
At the start, you made feel you are not getting enough out of this site and not seeing immediate progress. My advice is to hang around here and you will then get the feeling and understand how this site is a lifesaver (I am talking out of experience). Just normally after dwelling in porn for so long and always having the bad feeling and wanting to get out of this problem you think you have found the magic place and now it will be gone and done easily. Well I am telling you it takes a lot of blood and toil to break free. You just have to be determined enough and have the strength to fight the long and bloody battles and in these battles, like all battles, there are advances and retreats.
JUST HANG ON A KEEP ON POSTING, READING AND GETTING HELP FROM MORE EXPERIENCED WARRIORS!

Yitzchok

Greetings from another newbie!

Except for the age and level of expertise, our stories are somewhat similar.

I also started out standing in Korean stores, then convinced myself I need a computer for work (dealing with mostly middle-aged people who didn't check their emails more than once a week!)

I have busted through every filter I have put on.

i have have come to realize that the real battle is not with any machine or any woman or stimulus, but with my own ability to deal with my own desires.

Here's hoping...

welcome!

For sure you can make big changes in your life & get away from unwanted behavior. I did it - it is hard work, but it is well worth it.

happy to discuss any time.


hatzlacha!

Welcome to GYE. Your issue is similar to so many of us. You will discover that there are alot of ways to stay sober. Filters on a computer have their utility but the real challenge is to learn how to start filter your mind and your actions. The best way to do this is to take one day at a time. Find some friends who you can safely share your struggles with (that's where GYE forum and chats comes in) and read the handbook to get started. It's a move that you won't regret. Wishing you much hatzlacha.

Thanks for the chizuk!