I put webchaver.com on all of my computers today. I also have a rabbi as an accountability partner.

So things are looking up.

I must stay vigilant. I had a very exhausting day at work today. These are the times that I am more likely to seek "relief" in all the wrong places.

I am very happy that someone else now can keep track of what I am doing.

So things are looking up, but I must stay vigilant.

Kol Tov!

Nice to meet you holyjew : ) I hope, b'ezrat Hashem, that this works well for you, and that you will, at 120 yrs, be able to look back with great gratitude, at this time when you finally got free of this.

Today is 3 weeks! I have not looked at ANY images/pictures, whatever you want to call it. This is a huge accomplishment for me.

However, while at work today, some unholy thoughts came into my mind, particularly some S/M thoughts that I had not had for quite awhile. This was disturbing to me.

I get quite stressed out at work at times and I was trying to meditate to relax...however, that was when the thoughts came into my mind. I was also sitting on the floor when it happened and I had some images of women standing above me...I apologize for mentioning this on the Forum and I hope it is not upsetting or disturbing to anyone. If that is the case, please stop reading this...

The fact that I have this Forum and Guard Your Eyes to turn to does help.

Perhaps meditating on the ground is not a good idea. Perhaps I should meditate in a chair. Perhaps the thoughts will not come if I am not sitting on the ground.

It is very important that I have a way of relaxing at work. The meditating did help in me feel better when I came home tonight. So I need to figure out a way to relax my mind w/o sinful/unholy thoughts coming into it.

Thank you,

Holyjew

we don't talk about it enough in the rooms, but I feel diet is a HUGE component of recovery. I remember when I was eating healthy, veggies, no coffee, no dairy, little gluten... it made such a significant difference in my ability to relax and watch my thoughts and not be radically moved by them. so let me ask YOU and the group - is DIET a conscious part of your mental health regime? what foods are you eating? Are you drinking pop and nashing on pretzels and high salt high carb foods?
INQUIRING MINDS WANT TO KNOW.

Tonight may be a challenge. I have been having unclean thoughts all day. I'm afraid that when I go to bed tonight I might want to masturbate. Actually, quite worried...

I'm going to go to bed and say Shema.

hey holyjew,


how are you doing these days?

Al tirah mipachad layla.

Ki baboker chasdecha, v'emutecha b'laylot