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How I used GYE & the Arizal's 4-step program to break a 30-year lust addiction
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TOPIC: How I used GYE & the Arizal's 4-step program to break a 30-year lust addiction 11648 Views

Re: How I used GYE & the Arizal's 4-step program to break a 30-year lust addiction 10 Apr 2011 21:42 #103792

  • laagvokeles
First of all i gotta thank gye and u guys and bifrat reb yid, cause only whit this type of questions u help me think and make my mind clear, and its never enough… so thank you guys
Ill make it short cause i hate to read or write long messages (its long cause i copied reb yids words)…
1) reb yid wrote: How do you know that you can do it with just the Torah? You keep saying how hard it is. That's true. But maybe it would be less hard if you tried something different?    עד כאן
Haha dont make me laugh… this dosnt get eazzy no matter what the aproach Is
2) reb yid wrote: You say if you have the Torah, you don't need anything else. Does that mean you can do it but you just don't want to?  עד כאן
Exactly

3) reb yid wrote: If you believed that your addiction and your actions were like a poison that was killing you every day, would you be so confident that the Torah way will work for you? Would you be satisfied with your life being slowly sucked from your body without trying something new? Would you say that you will allow yourself to continue to die slowly because "it's so freaking hard"?עד כאן

Thats a very good טענה…. But tell me darling dont you have any bad mida that u know its not good and it ruins your relation with ppl and still you keep the bad mida?
So why dont i try the 12 steps? Cause its also freaking hard…
What i would try is castration but then again the bible dosnt let….

4) reb yid wrote:  So what's the Pshat? Maybe your YH is keeping you "frumer" than everyone else so that you destroy your life? Maybe you don't actually believe in the "Heiligkeit" of the Torah as much as you claim to? עד כאן
Tell me my wanting to do what ill find in sefarim in the matter of masturbation makes me frummer then any one allse? No.
Ist just that im a jew and  i dont need any favors from any stranger (when any way it dosnt get any eazzyer, part oft he 12 steps is sharing with ppl etc, and i dont have any friend that i can talk about it).
Why didnt i succeed yet? i dont succeed in many things, not only porn, is the reason cause the method (tora) is not good? No. Ist because i dont want it bad enough, if i would want it bad enough whouldnt i succeed? How do u know?

Last Edit: 10 Apr 2011 21:55 by .

Re: How I used GYE & the Arizal's 4-step program to break a 30-year lust addiction 10 Apr 2011 21:51 #103793

  • laagvokeles
Reb Yid wrote on 10 Apr 2011 21:30:

1 - For somebody to say that anything not written by "Frume Yidden" is automatically Kefira


read my posts never said it
Last Edit: by .

Re: How I used GYE & the Arizal's 4-step program to break a 30-year lust addiction 10 Apr 2011 22:00 #103795

  • laagvokeles
i also think if someone wants to understand why תורה שבעל פה was oficially not suposed to be written, he should come in in a forum in gye hes gonna see how much miss understnding there is when you say sevarot by writting....

by the way i just realised that u think i can ruin ppl so let me the trouble maker  make very clear:

im in trouble because of my private way that i think and i feel.... and i write what i feel.... im not sugesting any help to any boddy...
אדרבה i almost nevr say good words to any boddy besides "daven " or stuff like this, but never a practical idea....

true i think that many ppl can just decide to do tshuva an fisnish, but many can not (dont understand why but im not a psicolog)
Last Edit: 10 Apr 2011 22:09 by .

Re: How I used GYE & the Arizal's 4-step program to break a 30-year lust addiction 10 Apr 2011 22:06 #103798

  • me3
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laagvokeles wrote on 10 Apr 2011 21:42:

First of all i gotta thank gye and u guys and bifrat reb yid, cause only whit this type of questions u help me think and make my mind clear, and its never enough… so thank you guys
Ill make it short cause i hate to read or write long messages (its long cause i copied reb yids words)…
1) reb yid wrote: How do you know that you can do it with just the Torah? You keep saying how hard it is. That's true. But maybe it would be less hard if you tried something different?    עד כאן
Haha dont make me laugh… this dosnt get eazzy no matter what the aproach Is

How do you know if you have not tried?

2) reb yid wrote: You say if you have the Torah, you don't need anything else. Does that mean you can do it but you just don't want to?  עד כאן
Exactly


Exactly what? You don't want to? So why are you here?

3) reb yid wrote: If you believed that your addiction and your actions were like a poison that was killing you every day, would you be so confident that the Torah way will work for you? Would you be satisfied with your life being slowly sucked from your body without trying something new? Would you say that you will allow yourself to continue to die slowly because "it's so freaking hard"?עד כאן

Thats a very good טענה…. But tell me darling dont you have any bad mida that u know its not good and it ruins your relation with ppl and still you keep the bad mida?
So why dont i try the 12 steps? Cause its also freaking hard…
What i would try is castration but then again the bible dosnt let….

Actually the 12th step of the 12 steps suggests that you try the 12 steps or the ideas expressed there in all your affairs.

4) reb yid wrote:  So what's the Pshat? Maybe your YH is keeping you "frumer" than everyone else so that you destroy your life? Maybe you don't actually believe in the "Heiligkeit" of the Torah as much as you claim to? עד כאן
Tell me my wanting to do what ill find in sefarim in the matter of masturbation makes me frummer then any one allse? No.
Ist just that im a jew and  i dont need any favors from any stranger (when any way it dosnt get any eazzyer, part oft he 12 steps is sharing with ppl etc, and i dont have any friend that i can talk about it).
Why didnt i succeed yet? i dont succeed in many things, not only porn, is the reason cause the method (tora) is not good? No. Ist because i dont want it bad enough, if i would want it bad enough whouldnt i succeed? How do u know?

Bottom line is that you are not being successful currently, so we want you to try something new to help you.  What are you afraid of?
Last Edit: by .

Re: How I used GYE & the Arizal's 4-step program to break a 30-year lust addiction 10 Apr 2011 22:11 #103799

  • Reb Yid
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So why are you here?

If you are not working on it, if you are not ready to take the steps necessary to fix your situation, why are you here?

Posting here is supposed to be doing one of 2 things:
1 - helping yourself stay strong
2 - helping others stay strong.

The fact that you admit you are not trying now to help yourself says you are not posting for reason #1.

And you are only providing confusion, dissent, frustration, and everything but Chizuk for others, so that wipes out reason #2!!

So I repeat: Why are you here?

What are you really accomplishing with your negativity?
I am not perfect. Yes there are Midos that I am not doing well with. BUT I AM WORKING ON THEM!! And if I was not, I wouldn't be telling people who are working on those same things that their approach is all wrong!!

What is your true agenda? Is it maybe to save yourself from the guilt that you are not working on it? There's something to think about.

I don't even know why I am wasting so much time answering your comments. It just makes me so mad!

Did I say it would be easy with the 12 steps? Actually, I didn't even say it would work!! Here is what I said -
But maybe it would be less hard if you tried something different?


Now, how do you get from "Maybe" to "Definitely"?! And where does "Less hard" mean "Easy"?!!

Losing weight is also never easy. But there are some things that are less hard than others.
For people who really care, they will find the easiest thing to do, and do it. But not for people who only want to tell others what they are doing wrong, without doing a darn thing themselves.

About the Goyishe stuff being automatically Kefira, I was responding to Yosef hatzadik who was assuming that the only justification for your nonsense was that that's how you feel. He said it. Not me. And he was trying to defend you!!!

By the way - did you ever even read the 12 steps? just curious.

And, if anyone wants to know what's wrong with writing the Torah SheBa'al Peh, it's because anybody can say the stupidest things, and claim that they are based on Torah principals. If you don't believe me, read this forum!!!

And Me3, he is afraid that it will become obvious (to him, we already know it!) that it is he who is wrong here, and not everybody else. That seems to be the driving force behind all the arguments and posts. Guilt. Feeling threatened by the success of others. I can't think of another reason.

I will end with one last question:

WHY ARE YOU HERE??!!
I am special
I was chosen for this special mission.
I must succeed.
Klal Yisroel needs me.
Hashem needs me.
Chizuk From the Parsha www.guardyoureyes.org/forum/index.php?topic=3456.0
Letter From YH
www.guardyoureyes.org/forum/index.php?action=dlattach;topic=3445.0;attach=1631
Last Edit: by .

Re: How I used GYE & the Arizal's 4-step program to break a 30-year lust addiction 10 Apr 2011 22:22 #103802

  • laagvokeles
ai ai
i am here cause it helps me to talk to ppl, i would love if someone would say the right words and "wake me up", so im here, and a few times it helped me "hello! wake up"
just the way how i "wake up" is if someone סותר את דברי and tells me you wrong with what you think.
what can i do , i f i really think that in MY priavte case im stuck cause i need the רצון and it did not wake up yet?

thats why im here, to talk argue share opinions...im here cause i think that at least a few ppl are supoust to be able to cope with what i say and talk to me about it, isnt this the most professional place in the net for frum jews?
so i am here.

but if what i write makes ppl masturbate ill live and never come back...
אין אדם חוטא ולא לו
and i defnetly am not intrested to be a מחטיא את הרבים
Last Edit: by .

Re: How I used GYE & the Arizal's 4-step program to break a 30-year lust addiction 10 Apr 2011 22:42 #103805

  • ben durdayah
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laagvokeles wrote on 10 Apr 2011 21:42:

What i would try is castration but then again the bible dosnt let….


Laag,

I've never called you a liar before, but here you're stretching it a bit...

You would NEVER try castration, you love your little filth too much, and your entire hana'as oilam hazeh seems to come through m*******tion. Sorry, I don't buy that one.

Reb Yid wrote on 10 Apr 2011 22:11:

So why are you here?

WHY ARE YOU HERE??!!



Why is he here?

I can't believe you're even asking that question...

The answer is simple
Tsumi!


Where else can he get any?
For Dov and the other two guys who care,
My real name really is
 Eli
Like the original Bendy, Ein hadavar talui ela bee




 
Last Edit: by .

Re: How I used GYE & the Arizal's 4-step program to break a 30-year lust addiction 10 Apr 2011 22:54 #103806

  • laagvokeles
whats going on? why not try to help with good words and say: you know what laag YOU in YOUR case i really have pitty on you! i really feel sorry for u, u big time stuck! hashem should help you to get out of your mazav.
Thats help! thats all i wanna hear..
you can only cope with sweet american boys who speak polite and u tell them cute stuff?
come on i also exits and i am also a jew and i am also in trouble and i also deserve help....
just u gotta have seichel and aproach every boddy diffrently....

by the way maybe im more stupid then most of the guys here or maybe smurter either way im "or or" cause many many cant cope.... but others already also chaped my mehalech and they simply told me "we have pitty on you"
and i have 2

Last Edit: by .

Re: How I used GYE & the Arizal's 4-step program to break a 30-year lust addiction 10 Apr 2011 22:58 #103807

  • ben durdayah
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Did I say something wrong?

For Dov and the other two guys who care,
My real name really is
 Eli
Like the original Bendy, Ein hadavar talui ela bee




 
Last Edit: by .

Re: How I used GYE & the Arizal's 4-step program to break a 30-year lust addiction 10 Apr 2011 23:03 #103813

  • laagvokeles
lol
you with reb yid get "angry" unstead just realising
אז די יצר הרע האט מיר פארכאפט

all i said that made reb yid write a post is:
toiro before 12 steps

אזא גראויסע טראסק האב איך נישט געגלייבט איך וועל מאכען
i was just a mesiach lefi tumoi.... if it has mekorot in chazal go ahead if it dosnt have mekorot, than; number one try the toiro number 2 the 12 steps.
i have no clue whats the trask
Last Edit: 10 Apr 2011 23:05 by .

Re: How I used GYE & the Arizal's 4-step program to break a 30-year lust addiction 10 Apr 2011 23:12 #103814

  • ben durdayah
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No Laag,

I meant something else.

You said that if the heilige Toirah let, you'd consider castration.

I have a few questions on your statement, which cause me not to believe you a kee hoo zeh:

A) Do you really think that you're so far gone that only castration could solve your problem?

If so, would you really be willing to have such surgery?

C) Why don't you try chemical castration?

D) Castration is a one shot deal (you might need a divorce afterwards, but it could be that your wife would be ok with that...), whereas mast*****ion is (for you) a frequent flyer plan. If you care so much about what the heilge Toire says about castration, why couldn't you care equally about what the heilige Toire says about mas******ion?

Nuhr vuss, you love your filthy taavah, and you shudder to think of a knife attacking your apparatus...

That's the truth Laag, tell me if I'm wrong...

E

For Dov and the other two guys who care,
My real name really is
 Eli
Like the original Bendy, Ein hadavar talui ela bee




 
Last Edit: by .

Re: How I used GYE & the Arizal's 4-step program to break a 30-year lust addiction 10 Apr 2011 23:18 #103816

  • Reb Yid
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I have pity on you too. Much more than you know. But, I believe in the Chazal - yes, I believe in Chazal too, not just you - that says "Pischu Li Pesach Kepischo Shel Machas". You want Hashem to help you? THEN HELP YOURSELF FIRST!!! Instead of annalyzing what's wrong with everybody else, why don't you try to do something for yourself? When I came to GYE I also had a lot of שיטות. But I knew I needed help. And I knew the guys here had more experience than me. And I was willing to forgo my שיטות and take some advice. And now, I am 81 days clean. And what have you done? Did you come here ready to change? You admit - no. Did you come here ready to accept advice from those who have had success? - no. Instead, you come here like you know everything, when in fact you have done nothing!!!

People don't appreciate a know-it-all. When you are ready to be מכניע yourself and be quiet long enough to show people that you respect them and their success, and you care about what they have to say, you will find a world of support and welcoming open arms. Until then, you remain a Laag Vakeles Bagoyim.

Reb Yid wrote on 10 Apr 2011 20:09:


But I still wish you a complete recovery, and if you do it without the 12 steps and only using the Torah, nobody will be happier for you than me. Just stop talking and do something about it!!!!


That's what I said before. And I repeat it now. I do not hate you. And I want very much for you to overcome this. It just seems like I want you to succeed more than you want to succeed. And I have no patience for people like that telling other people how they should act.

Sorry.
I am special
I was chosen for this special mission.
I must succeed.
Klal Yisroel needs me.
Hashem needs me.
Chizuk From the Parsha www.guardyoureyes.org/forum/index.php?topic=3456.0
Letter From YH
www.guardyoureyes.org/forum/index.php?action=dlattach;topic=3445.0;attach=1631
Last Edit: by .

Re: How I used GYE & the Arizal's 4-step program to break a 30-year lust addiction 10 Apr 2011 23:28 #103819

  • laagvokeles
Reb Yid wrote on 10 Apr 2011 23:18:

Instead of annalyzing what's wrong with everybody else, why don't you try to do something for yourself?  And I have no patience for people like that telling other people how they should act.

Sorry.

טוען לו בחיטין וענה לו בשעורין

i never said that ppl are doing wrong never!

i said that in my private case i think that first ill try the toiro

again: i never said other ppl are wrong! if i did quote me!

i think that in my private case i will try the toiro before i even look into the 12 steps cause i have no reason to believe that the toiro wont help me, why didnt i succeed? cause i don want it bad enough


and to you durdaya you 100 % right....  i wast just tryeeng to make a point how hard it s for me to stop
Last Edit: 10 Apr 2011 23:30 by .

Re: How I used GYE & the Arizal's 4-step program to break a 30-year lust addiction 10 Apr 2011 23:40 #103821

  • laagvokeles
i just found a new נוסח to my problem maybe this is gonna be eazyer on you reb yid
5770 wrote on 02 Sep 2010 02:54:

i masturbate, i know it's wrong but i dont feel bad, i dont feel guilt

no guilt
nothing!

not a bit of it!

Is there anbybody out there who managed to change SOMETHING in their lives that made them feel this masturbation is really truly bad?  or is it just me who thinnks it's no biggie?


this i s my problem בקשר to (pay atenttion i know u bussey writting and i realised u wanna right more then read...) why dont i change my matzev evendo i know that
its a aveiro chamuro
and there is a little little little risk my wife should catch me cause im very carefoull and spend tons of energy she shouldnt... but still there is a risk (0.0000000001) and evendo i dont change and i dont feel any guilt.... a shame the tora dosnt let...
Last Edit: 10 Apr 2011 23:45 by .

Re: How I used GYE & the Arizal's 4-step program to break a 30-year lust addiction 11 Apr 2011 01:01 #103823

  • Reb Yid
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I'm sorry I got involved. I obviously see things differently than you do. I feel bad when I do Aveiros. You talk about the Torah's approach? Isn't Charata a very important part? I don't believe that means just feeling bad I did wrong, even though I don't know why it's wrong. But what do I know? You need not respond as I will not be replying to this thread anymore. I feel bad for Alex. He started a beautiful thread about what worked for him, and it seems to have been hijacked.

Anyway, Hatzlocha to all.
May Hashem help all of us to solve all of our issues, and not let our issues negatively affect anyone else!
Good bye.
I am special
I was chosen for this special mission.
I must succeed.
Klal Yisroel needs me.
Hashem needs me.
Chizuk From the Parsha www.guardyoureyes.org/forum/index.php?topic=3456.0
Letter From YH
www.guardyoureyes.org/forum/index.php?action=dlattach;topic=3445.0;attach=1631
Last Edit: by .
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