Vort I heard on Parshas Vayishlach from R’Y Frand

When Yaacov’s family was meeting Esav, the torah mentions Leah and the handmaids came forward and then the children.  But by Rachel it says “Negash Yoseph ve Rachel”, “Yoseph and Rachel came forward.”  Why did Yoseph go first, but all the other children went after their mother? Rashi explains that Yoseph said, my mother is so beautiful, maybe this rasha Esav will look at her.  I will stand opposite her and block him from looking at her.  From here, Yoseph was zoche to bircas haenayim.

Ok that’s nice, but how long was this going to last?  Eventually Esav was going to look past Yoseph and see the beauty of Rachel.  What’s the point?

The Tolne Rebbe, Rav Yitzchok Menachem (I think) answers with a mashal.  After the rebbe had his first son, he wanted to name it after his shver, Yaacov Yitzchok.  Obviously he couldn’t name it the full name as he carried the same name Yitzchok.  The problem is that his shver held that if the full name of the nifter is not given it’s as if it is gurnished! What should he do?  He wanted to honour his shver with the name, but this was against his shver’s own shi-tah.  He sent this question to the Gerer rebbe, who responded, “Something is better than nothing!” (Sounds better in Yiddish).  True, it’s not the full name, but a name is better than no name after him.

The same applies here with Yoseph.  Shielding Esav even for a few moments is better than no moment of protection.  When eshes potifar was seducing Yoseph, he was trying to say no.  Finally she was able to convince him to say, ok not today, but tomorrow. Yoseph agreed which ultimately saved him from this test. 

Many times we are faced with challenges that appear too huge to resist, but resisting for just a moment is better than nothing.  At least we should try saying not today, maybe tomorrow, or not this afternoon, not this hour, in another ten minutes.  We learn from Yoseph, pushing off even temporarily has its virtues!

Great vort. Yasher Koach.

Stuart wrote on 19 Nov 2010 05:22:


I never heard this... Do you have a mekor for this?

Heard R'Frand say it this past Thursday night, but maybe it was said to emphasis the point.  The exact loshon he used was something like, And Yoseph refused to be with her.  Eishas Potifar was frustrated and said, fine but tomorrow you must.  Yoeseph replied, ok maybe, as if just to get her off his back NOW.  I will b"n see if I could find something on this.

Wow so even Yoseph had to use this Etzoh let's become disciples from Yoseph  hatzadik when faced with a difficult  challenge and say just not now, no.

hold on, were still trying to find a mekor for this....

Stuart wrote on 19 Nov 2010 15:52:

I also heard it from Rabbi Frand's Shiur last night. He quoted Tzror HaMor who quoted a Medrash saying this.

Similar vort frm R' Moshe Feinstein זצ"ל on Parshas Shlach
Kalev spoke אחד בפה ואחד בלב to the other meraglim so that when it came to ויהס כלב..they quieted down and he was able to say good about מרע"ה.
פרעגט ר' משה, what's the point? A few second later they would start "booing" him and return to their bad words. -?-
והתירוץ כנ"ל, even if it won't last, every moment of doing the right thing counts.

מענן לענין... מעשה שהיה..
(I wasn't there..  but בערך..)
Reb Moshe was in the hospital, and a non-frum nurse was very impressed with him. She said, Rabbi, tell me what I should accept upon myself. Reb Moshe said, I want you to stop smoking.
He later explained "If I would tell her to do some frumkeit/something big (?) it wouldn't last. Now she'll stop smoking and although she'll be מחלל שבת the rest of the day anyway, at least this bit of חילול שבת she won't be doing."

Every bit counts. Something is better than nothing. Even if it won't last.

(In another topic you can see the משל of the חפץ חיים with the apple cart..)