Something seemed to stand out to me in this weeks parsha that I feel can give encouragement to us all as we struggle with this obsession:
"The rabble that was among them cultivated a craving, and the Children of Israel also wept once more, and said, "Who will feed us meat? We remember the fish that we ate in Egypt free of charge; the cucumbers, melons, leeks, onions, and garlic. But now, our life is parched, there is nothing; we have nothing to anticipate but the manna!" (Bamidbar 11:4-6).
Nothing to anticipate but the manna?! Was not the manna so satiating and wonderful? A spiritual food, feeding the Jewish people in a more full way than mere meat? However, we as addicts can identify with this sentiment. We, for whatever reason, have spurned G-d in search for something more meaty. We have overlooked the daily spirituality that a life with G-d has to offer, and instead, we have acceded to the demands of the yetzer hara, "cut yourself off from your source, and, in return, you'll receive something different and exciting."
Perhaps, this is the same sentiment that speaks up when we feel we can't come back to G-d; the idea that "our life is parched, there is nothing." So, in an effort to feel a deeper sense of existence, we cry out for something that will, to be honest, only satisfy us in a mundane, physical way. But not only that; we feel, because it won't/can't satisfy us in the same way that complete reliance on G-d does, that we must eat more and more, an endless cycle, resulting in the our overall destruction.
So, may we be always encouraged to seek the manna in our struggle, the complete reliance on G-d. Instead of complaining of only the possibility for manna, may we learn to love it and cherish the daily blessings that Hashem so willingly gives us; one day clean, two days clean, three days clean, etc. May we take our lives one clean day at a time!
