Hey guys,

I hope you don't think this is a rude or irrelevant question. Whenever I've masturbated, I've always felt physically drained for a few days after the act. It's like it literally takes everything out of me for a while.

What I want to know is whether sex is as tiring as masturbation? Do you guys feel as ill, unwell and as shattered as after you've wasted seed by masturbating? If sex makes you feel as rough afterwards, I don't understand why people think it's such an amazing pleasure. (I've never touched a girl in my life, lol) 

Anyway, I hope you guys had a great Xmas (Hannukah?) and that we all have a brilliant new year.

BW,

DL

well consensual sex, wherein both partners are connected on an emotional level, is FULFILLING. we only feel 'tired and drained' b/c we are unhappy and depressed - deep down inside we know what we have done is wrong...

Hey Teddy,

Thanks for your post! Yeah, I guess going against nature and God is always going to have evil consequences.

DesertLion wrote on 27 Dec 2010 17:44:


yes that, but it's even on a deep, phycological level. you feel crummy about urself when you act out, basically. It's not only a consequence of your action, it's the guilt and self-loathing that can do you in.

when you masturbate, you feel stupid, alone, unfulfilled. you feel EMPTY

the problem is that as single guys- we want to do this only when we are married. we know that, we think about it only like that- at least i do. but it is still so far away and not so easy to save oursleves for so long.
duz this get easier once ur engaged bec u can see the oppurtunity coming or harder bec u just cant wait anymore.
someone close to me once told me that "dw. youll be married very soon [within next 3-5 yrs he thought]. you can wait on ej......ng"
NOT THAT EASY! RIBONO SHEL OLAM. we want to be w someone  when we have these urges bt we cant wait 4 years!

the only thing is that this isnt the point of being married. the point of being married is to have a life partner that completes you and keeps you in line and that can help each other grow to hashem. it just happens that part of being married is having sex.
i usually dont think about when ill get married. im only 16. when i thnk about getting married, i get a lot of confusion and anxioty because i know that i dont want to get married before i get recoverey. and there a billion other things i need to do before im ready to get marrie. so i usually dont think about waiting since ill just have it in a couple years. but thats just me

To TEDDY:

Masturbation makes me feel all of those things you mentioned, but I suspect that we also feel exhausted bc the 'life force' must be physically draining out of us. It messes me up both physically and spiritually for a while. There must be a scientific explanation somewhere to support what you've said. 

Thanks for your posts mate - appreciate it.

To Struggling & Soldier:

Guys, I'm 25 and I haven't even touched a girl or even thought about marriage lol. It's not something that bothers me because like you I also have a billion more important things to do first.

Also, I believe in destiny: it will happen (or it won't) when it's meant to be. So I figure just chill, get on with life and let God run the show.

Anyway, thanks a lot guys and hope this coming year will be great for all of us here on GYE!

DL

good points guys but ill disagree and say that either fortunately or unfortuanetly when guys are getting engaged frequently its inevitable that you think about getting married.
for the right reasons ain hachi nami, but for guys like us the heter and oppurtunity fror sex is no small matter

HashemsSoldier wrote on 28 Dec 2010 21:20:


no way! i thought you were waaaaaay older.

Please don't take this in the wrong way but if you feel PHYSICALLY drained after m, you may have some problem. I would look into it. Normally one should feel invigorated.

sometimes i feel pain in that area afterwards but a majority of the time I do not

Pain is one thing (and it shouldn't be often or strong pain) but feeling physically drained for days is another. I would go for a general checkup, no harm done.

HashemsSoldier wrote on 28 Dec 2010 21:20:

I also thought you were waaaaaaaaaay older, I guess you just got some brains in your head and a mature outlook on life

RE: Feeling Physically drained for days after masturbation

I think it must have something to do with the excessive amount I used to indulge in this vice. This is painful for me to remember, but in my rock bottom phase (spiritual and physical) I couldn't attain an erection no matter what I did for almost half a year at the age of 21. I felt like I had one foot in the grave and I'm living proof that masturbation can kill you.

...and then u were cured?