Gevaaaaaaalig!

GABBEH LEARN HOW TO SPELLL

Gevaaaaaaalig!

GEVALDIGGGGGGGGGGGGG ALL CAPS AND A  "D"

smothery hugs!!!!!!! :D

Okay im feeling a little more koach now so ill try to post a bit...

Ive spent the last two nights drifting in and out of conciousness with high fever.
Its on and off,and last was particularly bad,with me throwing up several times,dizzy as anything...

I had quite crazy dreams,images flying by in my mind,one after another...
Somehow I found myself in the old city...
And a friend was standing next to me saying
"Just daven with your heart man"
And I opened the siddur and started crying.
What followed next is pretty hard to describe but i will to attempt to regardless...
As I stood there crying and lost in the words of the first few brachos of shmone esrei,I all of a sudden felt a wave of the most beautiful pleasure pass over me.
The only way to describe this pleasure is:orgasmic
Im sorry if that offends anyone,but thats the word that keeps appearing in my head when i reenvision the scene.
And I continued davening.....
And the feeling stayed just as strong (maybe even getting stronger)
And I woke up.

At that moment it was so clear what is happening to me...
I am stripping myself completely.
I am shedding all the layers of protection.
All the coats of filth and fantasy
And the all too powerful blanket of lust.
Now I am empty.
And I cry.
And only now,precisely now,can G-d fill every part of me.
Last night He gave me a taste of what a relationship with Him can be.
And I davened today for the first time in a weekish.
And I said half of tehillim.
And I spoke to Hashem every time I woke up last night (after i had that dream),feverish and chilly,just to smile at Him and say "Thank you"
And I'm gonna start sleeping with a tehillim clutched to my heart(i did today during my nap already).

I'm starting to see the peices of the puzzle fitting together.
Sometimes one has to become empty to experience true fullness.

love
-uri

TATTTEH IN HIMMMEL

VITAHER LIBEINU LI-AVDECHA BE-EMES

WHO IS MORE HONEST THE HUGGABLE URI?

I have my own derech how I do my Gevaaaaaaaalig!

For many reasons. just to mention a few.

1) I like to be Original!

2) I tried to pronounce it your way GEVALDIGGGGGGG! & its harder then saying Echuddddddddd in Kriaas Shimah. ts like Stuttttering in reverse.

and the list goes on!

my new GEVALDIGGGGGGG is SMITHEREEEEEEEEEEEEEEENS! but it doesn't always apply!

"Sometimes one has to become empty to experience true fullness."

That's a definite ACE Quote as well as the rest of the post.

letakain21 wrote on 16 Sep 2009 16:58:


IN WHAT COLOR MAMELEH??

is green free? I want the GYE color- i think it might be worth more points! :D ;D

Hey Uri,

I don't know how the hell you pulled over. Like I said before, if I ever crossed that line I'd be a lost cause by now. But you can turn around in the middle of an act...wow.

The strength required to do that is like that of a...a...a superhero!

Perhaps I am not so deserving of my screenname....

Uri?
why in the world do you guys always make me cry?????????
I've cried more in the past week than i have the whole year, between momo and tomim and bruce and struggle and you and and and... everyone else!
k, so some of them were happy tears, but still.
I love that you felt Hashem's love. Just try not to ever forget what it feels like.

I think that of the 116,734 posts so far on this forum, Uri's last post just took the cake. I was like, completely blown away. WOW.

Uri, you are describing the deepest truths of the Universe. "Zos Hatorah, Adam ki Yamus Ba'Ohel". And lehavdil, as the White-Book of SA says: "We must die to ourselves before we can begin to live".

Check this out. A little childish, but gets across the idea you are saying, sort of.

I remember "Mom" once writing to me about a similar experience she had, as she was truly beginning recovery. She was on an almost "orgasmic" high of de'Veikus for a while. It was Poshut scary.

Mom?

guardureyes wrote on 16 Sep 2009 20:18:


But, who's counting?  :D ;D

Uri, I just want to let you know that it's not just a one time thing. You can reach a point where you get this feeling quite often! Just, lema'an Hashem don't stop in the middle! Keep getting closer to Hashem and never stop!!!

I promise you there will be ups and downs, there's no other way! [Until Moshi'ach comes] Never forget where you're headed, never lose sight of your goal! And never ever even consider giving up!!

with a heart full of love,
batlleworn