my personal defense system is that i run away from people (or beings) that i feel ashamed or awkward or uncomfortable around.
And G-d makes me feel all the above.

My word on the poll: Don't seek out validation. What everyone thinks is irrelevant. If you can do it, you can do it; you'll have to trust yourself on this. If you can trust yourself, you'll have no problem succeeding.

2B

My word on the poll:It's not validation.It was a simple way to feel the oylam believes in me to give me chizzuk.

Now start posting more on your thread!!Get off of mine.You are not allowed back until you post at least 3 posts.

love ya man-uri

Uri, why not simply run away from the people who don't support you and run to your real friends (us  )and HaShem?

Uri wrote on 03 Sep 2009 08:43:


AMEN!!
I second that, triple that, quadruple that and more, to infiniti and beyond!!!!!!!
I'm also lolling!! :D :D ;D ;D

"Let go and let G-d" makes so much sense. We need to let go of our defenses and trust in G-d, and then the world will suddenly be a much more beautiful place.

Momo wrote on 03 Sep 2009 08:54:

i dont know how to do that.im sorry.i just run from pretty much everybody.

I put a long moshol up in the bais if anyone is interested.
i got it from rav fischel schachter shlit'a torahanytime.com/Rabbi/Fischel_Schachter/index.html

Uri wrote on 02 Sep 2009 21:59:


oy, uri! you are such a special neshama! even when your not singing, your words can be a song! i wanna say that tefilla before davening/ after! Hashem please help me! What a special call! I'm so proud to be your sister and to witness you get up and try! keep those lights flashing! Shomayim is lit up!!!!!!!!

Speaking of running away from Hashem did anyone ever see the children's book called The Runaway Bunny?
A young bunny decides one day that he will run away from home.
Mommy Bunny:If you run away,I will run after you.For you are my little bunny.
Little Bunny:If you run away after me,I will become a fish and will swim away from you.
Mommy Bunny:If you become a fish,I will become a fisherman and I will catch you,for you are my little bunny.
Little Bunny:If you become a fisherman,I will become a flower and hide in a garden and you will not be able to find me.
Mommy Bunny:If you became a flower,I will become a gardener and I will pick you,for you are my little bunny.
Little Bunny:If you become a gardener,I will become a rock,and I will sit on a humongous mountain and you will not find me.
Mommy Bunny:If you become a rock on a mountain,I will become a rock-climber and I will come find you,for you are my little bunny.

And so on...

Many of us are familiar with this book.
Hashem is our Daddy.
We can run away from Him.
But He will come look for us.
For we are His little bunnies.
And He wants to be with us.
And He wants to hold us.
Will we let Him?

-uri




The Runaway Bunny begins with a young bunny who decides to run away: "'If you run away,' said his mother, 'I will run after you. For you are my little bunny.'" And so begins a delightful, imaginary game of chase. No matter how many forms the little bunny takes--a fish in a stream, a crocus in a hidden garden, a rock on a mountain--his steadfast, adoring, protective mother finds a way of retrieving him. The soothing rhythm of the bunny banter--along with the surreal, dream-like pictures--never fail to infuse young readers with a complete sense of security and peace. For any small child who has toyed with the idea of running away or testing the strength of Mom's love, this old favorite will comfort and reassure. (Baby to preschool)

Thanks sis.
You're proud?
Imagine mine and your mother's pride as we watch you conquer day after day!!
26 days yea?
im on 1
but please feel free to use that tefilla.it is not copyright

I will share some perspective that i received from two heilege yidden today.
I am in touch with both of them by phone.
One is a partner.I will not share his name,cause I don't know if he wants me to reveal that we talk.
Uri:I can't help but escape from this frightening world,and retreat into my own sad world.
Him:Uri,2 things.First of all,start looking around.G-d is everywhere!There is no world,whether yours or anyone else's that isn't filled with Him,even if they don't realize.Second of all,the way to leave your world maybe is to start leaving it in periods and start giving.It will give you a whole new perspective on the world,and it will be a brighter place.

Shkoyach Reb Noach

The second person I spoke with was battleworn:
Uri:I can't stop running away from G-d.I just feel that He is so angry at me,and I can't bear to face Him any longer!
Battleworn: Uri,you must understand.There is no such concept of "hate" or "anger" or even "frustration" when it comes to our Father in Heaven.He created us to do good to us,and He knew that we woul fall,obviously.We just have to stick to Him and understand that He loves us and will always love us.In fact,the Zohar states that if only a person knew how much Hashem loves him,he would roar like a lion with happiness and strength.
Uri:I hear.But how come it says things like "Vayichar af Hashem" in the Torah?
Battleworn:The Rambam explains that Hashem speaks to us in any way that we can understand.For some people,Hashem "offers" them life,for some money,for some land.Whatever gets us to come close to Him.Some understand anger.That is great if that's what works for them,but for someone like you,it might be worthwhile to take a different approach.
Uri:But does it not say straight out in shema that if we do not listen,we will be punished and kicked out of the land and suffer?
Battleworn:That is true and a good point.Hashem does this so that we will do teshuva and become closer to Him.He's not "punishing" us.Understand that well.He's doing whatever it will take to get us to do teshuva.
Uri:But I'm so very far from this teshuva you speak of.How can I have trust in Him if His good to me is dependant on my merits?
Battleworn: There is a pasuk in tehillim that says "Many are the chovos of the evil ones,but the one who has trust in Hashem,kindness will surround him."Pretty much all the meforshim agree that the end of the pasuk is talking about the reshaim also.If we have bitachon then that can wipe away our chovos and there will be only good.
Uri:But how is that so?Does bitachon possibly take the place of teshuva?
Battleworn:In a way,yes!Because the problem with sins is that they further us from Hashem,and teshuva reverses that and brings us closer.That's the beauty of teshiva.And emuna and bitachon have that same facet and purpose:to bring us close to our tatte in shamayim.

There was more but these are the main points i feel.
This put new perspective on several issues that i was dealing with.
i hope someone might find this useful
-uri

Oy, dis is GEVALDIGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG!

Uri, it's really fun how you write down everything you learn from everyone, Reb Shraga, your partner, Battleworn, Mom, etc... Not only does it help clarify it in your mind, but it inspires us all as well - and there's so much we can learn from it! Thank you Tzadik.

Uri wrote on 03 Sep 2009 08:31:


B"H, a recovering drunk (his name is Sandy Beach. Really. ???) taught me that in sobriety he eventually came to see that his real problem actually isn't drinking. His actual living problem is - sobriety! Living sober "really drives him to drink"! ;D Yup.
Through his struggles working his steps he discovered this. He found out that he simply didn't have the tools he needed in order to just live. It was just too hard, too painful, too scary, too whatever (see your own 4th step for further details...).
I feel the same way. The 12 steps - not "the 12 steps" as an entity at all, but the work I did/do using them - gives me the ability to live the life that Hashem gives me today, w/o lusting and acting out, same as as it did for that alkie. Otherwise I'd be out there and dead by now. I believe that if I sit back now and rely on whatever I tried to use before, I'd be failing again, just like before. Anyway, I stopped running when I realized I have no one to run from but myself, and running from me wouldn't work anyway, because the addiction would kill (the running) me first... ???
As it turns out, I think the last "entity" for me to ever, ever be afraid of is: Hashem. I hope I'll never be so confused as to become afraid of Hashem, c"v. Of course, by "afraid", I mean being afraid of Him because of what He may do to me. While such an understanding of yir'as Shomayim and Hashem in general may work for some yidden (who knows?), it doesn't work for me at all so I don't use it. Love ya. - Dov

I sometimes feel a little lonely here on the forum,to be honest.
I struggle alot with sexual relationships.
I dont hear about that so much here.
Either its porn or mast***
And then there are the married ones.
Are there people here struggling to keep away from sex with girls?Or am I alone?