Reb Uri -
To echo what the berdichever wrote you above, (but , of course, in a lower-case and relatively boring way):
I know what you mean when you say yiddishkeit is sexually frustrating.
Let's just look at some facts on the ground, though:
I don't know about you, but, when
I'm serving Lust, no amount of sex is enough. When
I'm serving lust,
no one is pretty enough - once anyone prettier walks by! When
I'm serving Lust, there is no real room for anyone else, only for my needs. When
I'm serving Lust, I make poor choices that reduce my options in life to either "stupid", "bad", or "whatever". I become more needy, rather than more independent. When
I'm serving Lust, I am ALWAYS HUNGRY. (oops! back to lower case,
quick!) And
I mean always. So Lusting, not lack of sex, makes me frustrated.
Have
you ever found satisfaction in acting out? I thought I did. But after a while I discovered that it just
imitates satisfaction by quieting the very pain of the neediness,
of itself! "Ahh, what a relief!...Not." That is actually quite a rip-off. That has been
my experience, monsieur. How about you?
Yiddishkeit obviously says "whoaa!", which
is frustrating, especially to anyone who really feels entitled to x, to y, and/or to z. But in saying "wait", it gives us a
chance at using the framework that even my roman catholic sponsor marvels at: A
program for creating and maintaining sexual satisfaction in marriage. Look around you (or better yet,
don't - ha,ha - sorry): would there be such $ucce$$ in the "sex :o sells" industry if most folks were
satisfied ? We yidden inherited a plan to help couples (if they want to use it for that)grow progressively and unexpectedly closer by taking an inescapable monthly bodily process and turning it into an exercise that's cyclical, like everything else in life. It works if you work it. And our program to help not-yet-couple-people is: Don't feed it, it'll just grow, dum-dum. (
we say it a lot nicer that dov does, though.. :
)
So, we all know we have desires, we are human, no? None of us are perfect, not even saints, they say...But we also all know what religion is
really sexually frustrating. It's the religion of Lust, not yiddishkeit.
To another person hungry for the peace of Hashem's Love,
Dov
PS. Wow! Look at how many friends you have made, Uri! Sheesh!