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Where I'm at
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A platform of recovery for Jews who find themselves struggling with addictions to pornography, masturbation or other sexual problems. Post anonymously about your struggles without fear of anyone finding out who you are. Ask questions, post answers and be inspired! Get tips and guidance from the experts who moderate this forum, as well as from fellow strugglers.

TOPIC: Where I'm at 43406 Views

Re: Where I'm at 13 Aug 2009 18:44 #12134

  • habib613
Ykv_schwartz wrote on 13 Aug 2009 18:26:

Efshar Letaken wrote on 13 Aug 2009 18:10:

I don't know why no one has mentioned this but why not Marry the Girl?

If your in Love & she's Frum then why not?

It wont be the first or the last.


I was thinking the same thing. I just didn't have the guts to say so. I was afraid of being criticized.


ditto
Last Edit: by Timjoshua.

Re: Where I'm at 13 Aug 2009 20:22 #12155

  • Uri
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Theres a new song up,if anyone hasnt seen it yet
rehab-my-site.com/guardureyes/forum/index.php?topic=742.45
enjoy
Last Edit: by week.

Re: Where I'm at 13 Aug 2009 20:27 #12158

  • Efshar Letaken
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Woughw! Did anyone realize this or is it just me?

Uri walks into the room, puts his song down & just leaves without making a comment on the latest very important topic we are talking about here.

Wow!

I don't know what to make of it. Wheres Mom? oh! shes at the beach.

I guess it is what it is. I will remember this one. NuNu!

E.L.
Last Edit: by simchi.

Re: Where I'm at 13 Aug 2009 20:30 #12160

  • habib613
i think he's too busy thinking to post about that.
give him some time.
Last Edit: by Baalteshuva613.

Re: Where I'm at 13 Aug 2009 20:49 #12169

  • the.guard
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I don't know if it's such a good idea for one sex addict to marry another one. Unless she really wants to do Teshuvah like Uri does, and becomes part of our community. In that case, I would be the mesader kedushin!  ;D
Webmaster of www.guardyoureyes.org - Maintaining Moral Purity in Today's World. We’re here on a quest ; it’s really all a test. Just do your best and G-d will do the rest.
Last Edit: by Gravedigger .

Re: Where I'm at 13 Aug 2009 20:50 #12170

  • Tomim2B
About marrying the girl: Ahem... Don't even approach it without a "90-day no sex period" from the time you reconnect with her. That way both of you will prove to yourselves and each-other that it's only love you're after. Otherwise, instead of breaking away from your addiction, you'll be signing a contract with it.

2B
Last Edit: by Loves life.

Re: Where I'm at 13 Aug 2009 20:54 #12171

  • Uri
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Chevra i just got invited over to a girls house.her family is in america(land of the free porn) and her house is empty.why am i posting this?heaven knows.cause i dont.what kind of 20 year old boy hesitates on an oppurtunity like this?am i gay?
oy maybe im gay!
ok people im starting a poll
uri

btw i dont have so much time.no mussar please.just love..
Last Edit: by imbeinghelped@gmail.com.

Re: Where I'm at 13 Aug 2009 20:58 #12173

Uri,
Please....
Its good Bardichev is not online now. he would be typing in bold uppercase super hyper letters.

You have ALL our love.

and Rabbeinu,

Please make a poll if it is OK to make shiduchim on GYE.


Rashi, Breishis (10:25)
Last Edit: by Iamdone.

Re: Where I'm at 13 Aug 2009 21:05 #12175

  • habib613
Uri my dear brother
you are not going to go to this girl's house.
you are going to sit at home, and read through your post to remember what you've been aiming for, and then you will sit down and write a song, and probably cry.
but it is soooo much better for you to cry now than to cry in a couple of hours after you leave her house.

this nisayon is soooo sooo hard, but you aren't fighting alone anymore. you have all of GYE on your side, and remember that Hashem is rooting for you!
Last Edit: by Helphashem246.

Re: Where I'm at 13 Aug 2009 21:06 #12177

  • Efshar Letaken
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Uri,

You post it for you know that you are much bigger then that.

You know what the invitation = to & No! your not gay! your just a Hashems beloved son that doesn't want to let down his father in Heaven that knows he can do better.

Uri,
I don't want to mix in to your private life although that's what this forum is all about, but Hashem wants us to get "married" at 18 for a reason.

We have this sexual desire so that we can have kids so that the world keeps on going.

You will make your life much easier if you have a soul mate you can shear your real love with, with Kedusha.

No Musar. just some good old free advice coming from the Torah.

E.L.
Last Edit: by goy78620.

Re: Where I'm at 13 Aug 2009 21:07 #12178

  • Tomim2B
Uri,

I'm glad the lines between right and wrong are not blurred for you. You know what to do!  

As my signature writes: “Man's last freedom is his freedom to choose how he will react in any given situation” - Viktor E. Frankl.

You're doing great! Keep it up!

2B
Last Edit: by Anony Mouse.

Re: Where I'm at 13 Aug 2009 21:11 #12180

  • Uri
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ok.to everyone who had the suggestion of gettig married.
so i get married.break all the taharas hamishpacha laws,look at porn when my wife is not available,look at other women as my desire for her detirorates,but go crazy if she speaks to another man,follow her around,fantasize about other women while with her,probably cheat on her,and be "like a chicken"in the words of chazal.
i hear..ill give it some thought...
Uri (Unbelievably Restless Ingrate)
Last Edit: 13 Aug 2009 21:48 by phill.

Re: Where I'm at 13 Aug 2009 21:19 #12186

  • Dov
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Uri (JA) wrote on 13 Aug 2009 10:44:

AMEN!!
this link is only for people who already use youtube 


Dear Uri - Thanks for the link. But...just for the record:

I feel I cannot use youtube, at all. So I don't. There. I said it! The pop-up thumbnails on the side are sometimes unclean and if I intentionally go there and then see them it's really bad for me. Besides, I may fantasize, who knows? I can't afford to do that now. I am actually less able to intentionally use lust now, than I ever was. So I use it less and less. It seems to be progressive. My own natural version of s'chor, s'chor. Not planned or l'shaim Shomayim, it just happened that way...and my life is getting better and better at the same time, even though I'm not intentionally trying to improve it at all.
To whoever among you who can use youtube, I say, "Great! and more power to-ya."
I actually wish I could use it, too. I last had difficulty about six mo ago when trying to use it to view and record great songs by the amazingly talented yid, Yosef Kauduner. Apparently, before that I could use it, though it was an occasional problem for me....
I recorded five of his GREAT songs (audio) onto my phone (Uri's is too long for my phone!!) and listen to them a lot. I am addicted to his music (though technically, it would only be "making my life unmanageable" if c"v I used youtube for it anyway, even though it was dangerous for me! ).
Anyhoo, I just wanted to admit that to friends. It helps me remember I have limitations and that it's OK. Chow for now.
Dov
"Off the 18-wheeler and fine on this tricycle!", "I do not particularly care exactly which "lav" suicide is. I'm not interested in it for other reasons...and you are probably the same."
Last Edit: by havebitachon.

Re: Where I'm at 13 Aug 2009 21:21 #12188

  • Uri
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Ok just to explain the poll...
so i was in a weird mood and i posted an innapropriate poll and i dont know how to delete the poll so i just switched up the question.
and i guess chulent was the most important topic on my mind,so there you go..
Last Edit: by Chosenforsobriety.

Re: Where I'm at 13 Aug 2009 21:23 #12190

  • Efshar Letaken
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The point is that getting married will help you NOT be that person you are talking about if you stick around on GYE.

But But But.......

If you think that you are at that level of addiction then maybe you should work on the 12 step program seriously because it want get any better.

Reb Guard mentioned the other day of a new place in Yerushalaim that oped up that might be very helpful for you.

E.L.
Last Edit: by ataglance12345.
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