Forum

Welcome, Guest

Unable or Unwilling?

(0 viewing)

A platform of recovery for Jews who find themselves struggling with addictions to pornography, masturbation or other sexual problems. Post anonymously about your struggles without fear of anyone finding out who you are. Ask questions, post answers and be inspired! Get tips and guidance from the experts who moderate this forum, as well as from fellow strugglers.

Reply Topic

New Topic

Page:
1

TOPIC: Unable or Unwilling? 399 Views

Unable or Unwilling? 28 Nov 2010 02:23 #87021

kedusha
Current streak: 717 days
OFFLINE
Administrator
Posts: 3167
Karma: 46

The Posuk says in the beginning of Parshas Vayeishev that Yosef's brothers hated him - "and they could not speak peaceably with him." Targum Onkelos, apparently recognizing that it's not literally true that the brothers were unable to speak to Yosef in a nice way, translates the Posuk: "and they did not want to speak peaceably with him."

Many times when we tell ourselves that we're unable to do something good (get up for Minyan, stay clean, etc.), what we really mean is that we don't want to do it. If we really wanted to succeed, we would work on taking whatever steps were necessary to, b'Ezras Hashem, help us be successful.

Just as an alcoholic needs to avoid that first sip, a lust addict needs to avoid that first slip.Slip today? No way! ;)Fall today? No way, Jose'!

Last Edit: 28 Nov 2010 05:12 by .

Re: Unable or Unwilling? 28 Nov 2010 02:50 #87022

frumfiend	An addict is powerless
	Last Edit: by .

Re: Unable or Unwilling? 28 Nov 2010 04:30 #87032

kedusha
Current streak: 717 days
OFFLINE
Administrator
Posts: 3167
Karma: 46

Frumfiend The star wrote on 28 Nov 2010 02:50:

An addict is powerless

If that were the entire story, what's the purpose of AA, SA, or GYE for that matter?

An addict may be powerless to simply stop the addictive behavior by means of sheer will power. However, he is not powerless to make good choices, such as reaching out to others and to the RBS"O, and to taking steps that will help him enter recovery, one day at a time.

Just as an alcoholic needs to avoid that first sip, a lust addict needs to avoid that first slip.Slip today? No way! ;)Fall today? No way, Jose'!

Last Edit: 28 Nov 2010 04:34 by .

Re: Unable or Unwilling? 28 Nov 2010 06:37 #87039

installed OFFLINE Platinum Boarder Posts: 455 Karma: 0	Great point, Kedusha!
	Last Edit: by .

Re: Unable or Unwilling? 28 Nov 2010 12:49 #87043

frumfiend	That wasnt the impression the original post gave. This problem isnt comparable to getting up for minyan. This addiction needs a program. You cant do it on your own.
	Last Edit: by .

Re: Unable or Unwilling? 28 Nov 2010 15:17 #87052

kedusha Current streak: 717 days OFFLINE Administrator Posts: 3167 Karma: 46	Right, but there are people who say they just can't stay clean, program or no program. What they're really saying is that they would rather act out than work the program. As for waking up for Minyan, this idea can be applied whether we're dealing with an addiction or not.
	Just as an alcoholic needs to avoid that first sip, a lust addict needs to avoid that first slip.Slip today? No way! ;)Fall today? No way, Jose'! Last Edit: 28 Nov 2010 15:25 by .

Re: Unable or Unwilling? 28 Nov 2010 16:37 #87061

the.guard Current streak: 805 days OFFLINE Moderator Posts: 6438 Karma: 138	We may be powerless over diabetes, but we aren't powerless to take our insulin!
	Webmaster of www.guardyoureyes.org - Maintaining Moral Purity in Today's World. We’re here on a quest ; it’s really all a test. Just do your best and G-d will do the rest. Last Edit: by .

Re: Unable or Unwilling? 28 Nov 2010 17:02 #87064

frumfiend	Reb guard beautifully said
	Last Edit: by .

Re: Unable or Unwilling? 28 Nov 2010 18:58 #87081

kedusha Current streak: 717 days OFFLINE Administrator Posts: 3167 Karma: 46	Yes, that's my point precisely.
	Just as an alcoholic needs to avoid that first sip, a lust addict needs to avoid that first slip.Slip today? No way! ;)Fall today? No way, Jose'! Last Edit: by .

Re: Unable or Unwilling? 28 Nov 2010 19:56 #87087

DovInIsrael	ok - but some people are powerless. imagine a TV .. which someone stuck a screwdriver into! static .. zzz! powerless to give a clear reception - UNTIL someone pulls the screwdriver out! but one has to WANT to pull the screwdriver out, and get better reception dov.ii if one medicine does not work - try another
	Last Edit: by .

Re: Unable or Unwilling? 28 Nov 2010 21:04 #87104

Eye.nonymous OFFLINE Platinum Boarder Posts: 2696 Karma: 15	guardureyes wrote on 28 Nov 2010 16:37: We may be powerless over diabetes, but we aren't powerless to take our insulin! That was great. Did you rehearse that?
	Visit me at Eye.nonymous official countAnd also check out Additional Tools for recovery Last Edit: by .

Re: Unable or Unwilling? 28 Nov 2010 21:09 #87108

silentbattle Current streak: 1628 days OFFLINE Platinum Boarder Posts: 3734 Karma: 15	Wow. That is incredibly true, and very powerful.
	Last Edit: by .

Re: Unable or Unwilling? 01 Dec 2010 16:47 #87479

the.guard Current streak: 805 days OFFLINE Moderator Posts: 6438 Karma: 138	Eye.nonymous wrote on 28 Nov 2010 21:04: guardureyes wrote on 28 Nov 2010 16:37: We may be powerless over diabetes, but we aren't powerless to take our insulin! That was great. Did you rehearse that? This is the ABC's of the GYE network (and the 12-Step programs) :D
	Webmaster of www.guardyoureyes.org - Maintaining Moral Purity in Today's World. We’re here on a quest ; it’s really all a test. Just do your best and G-d will do the rest. Last Edit: by .