Until our times issues that we struggle with where always delt with quietly. In fact many of the big issues that existed in our communities (and we always had very real issues) were not talked about or taught in schools rather they were delt with quietly.


This had the virtue that the mass did not know how wide spread it was and many thought it did not exist and therefore they did not sin like that out of shame.

Note s** ed has done little for stopping AIDS.

So now we need to deal with p* and m* on a large scale BUT  I think making a party goes too far. If we make public parties we brake the taboo and the sin is viewed as not so chamur.

If we make parties more people know about the issue and they talk about it and it becomes easier to fall.   

I wonder why no one has attacked me or agreed with my opinion.

To restate the question. Is making parties about being clean hurting more people than it is helping?

I believe this topic, the need to balance the need for publicity with need for keeping it quiet, is something us GYEers should explore.

IMHO, i think that the way things stand now there is too little publicity about these things and we need more. i realize that too much is not good either but i think that currently the balance is too far over to the hush-hush side.

Agree. Good Question..??

Until our times bochrim could not view porn while a rebbe gives shuir in the beis medresh. Come on who are we fooling? How much longer can we pretend?

Bochurim shouldn't be afraid to discuss openly this "great sin". Secrecy compounds the problem.

Nobody complained when Guard started GYE's, well perhaps then a few did.

Shkoah to Yossi for leading the way. Look many bochurim he's saving at the prime of their lives.

I also think this topic has been taboo for too long.  But the y"h miscalculated.  By unleashing the nuclear bomb called the Internet, he forced this topic to be brought out in the open.

I don't think making parties is hurting people.  If someone is going to fall, they will fall as many of us can attest to.
Nevertheless, I was surprised how publicized this got especially the involvement with the rebbeim.

Holy Yid wrote on 10 Nov 2010 20:30:


www.guardureyes.com/GUE/FAQ/FAQ4.asp

guardureyes wrote on 11 Nov 2010 19:48:


I do not question the need to talk about this in public and to offer help to any and all who. Of course part of that help is guidance about avoiding the problem.

My question is putting a face on it and making parties a bad thing

Putting a face on it makes it much closer to home. Making parties makes it seem like a good thing that is almost extra credit.

Holy Yid,

Gotta agree with you!

My magid shiur would occasionally hint about grave sins that many of us may be facing and that he was open to talking privately about anything (I didn't go because I wasn't too fond of him BUT I think that it was the right approach).

My father tried talking about it with me but I avoided talking about it at all costs (I felt VERY uncomfortable talking about it with my FATHER).

I'm on this site so the above methods obviously didn't work for me (I blame myself and not my educators/parents) but I still think that they are the best methods (don't know about the father son thing but I appreciate it now). I think that GYE is a great tool as it is discreet and serious but the party thing is going too far IMHO.

I'm still single and I sometimes think to myself "what would I do differently as a father" and to be honest, I can't think of any better method. I would try to limit my kids exposure to tv/movies/internet but I'm very realistic and know that by the time my kids will be teens there will be free blanket WIFI with affordable devices that will connect to the internet. We will have to adapt to the new realities but I really hope that the mainstream approach will not go in that direction. 

Please don't get me wrong, I'm impressed by the initiative but we really should take a step back and think of the potential side effects.

installed wrote on 12 Nov 2010 10:49:


Don't worry about tomorrow's technology - we have enough trouble with today's! 

B'Ezras Hashem, for every technology, there will be a counter technology, although it can take some time for the latter to become available (that's why it's never wise to seek the latest devices).  And, b'Ezras Hashem, with the continued expansion of GYE, there will be many tools available for both prevention and recovery.