My dear brothers & sisters
My heart was with you ,this past Shabbos,when I was thinking about what I heard in the name of the Baal Shem Tov on what Bilaam said "Neum Hagaver Shesum H'ayin"
What is "Shesum H'ayin"?
Onkelos says that it means that the eye saw very well.Rashi says that Bilaam was blind in that one eye.
How could Onkelos and Rashi say the opposite of each other on the same word?
The answer ,says the Baal Shem Tov, is that both are right,both are true and at the same time.
A tzaddik sees things with Ruach Hakodesh,with divine inspiration.In earlier years there was prophecy.How did the eye see this?Because he closed the physical eye from seeing things he shouldn't be seeing.By closing the outer eyes from evil,the inward spiritual eye looks deep in,is wide open,and sees things,beautiful treasures,secrets of the Torah,that no one else can see
So the question arises:How could Bilaam who saw all the filth of the world,how could he see prophecy.How could be perceive the beauty of Ohel Yaakov?The answer is that Hashem blinded one of Biliaam's eyes from birth.That eye never saw the filth,that eye never saw evil,that eye could never be contaminated.It is from that blind eye that he saw the beauty of Ohel Yaakov.So both Onkelos and Rashi are right.Bilaam saw very well spiritually -with the eye that was blind physically
My beloved brothers and sisters.When we close our eyes from the filth around us,from things we are not allowed to see,our inward eye opens up.We see beautiful secrets from the depths of our neshama.Even if in the past we damaged our eyes,the damage is not irreversable.It doesn't need to go blind chas v'shalom.The Tshuva cleans the eye from the past and closing it in the present will open our spiritual eye to see the wonders of Hashem and the greatness of our neshomoh.
It's a little scary and lonely because in the beginning,as we close our eyes from the bad of the world,our inward eye has not yet opened.It may take some time to see and develop.During that time one may feel alone and in great pain,missing this harmful(but addictive) stimulant from outside ,without yet feeling the light and warmth from within.
Don't despair during this time.
That is when you need to feel all your brothers and sisters here holding your hand-giving you a hug,giving you chizzuk.Hashem is holding your hand.Soon it will become easier,it will become less painful,soon it will be wonderful.But you just need to stick with it.Dont give in to you outer eye.Use it for good things only.Have faith in yourself-You can do it!!!
And then sometimes suddenly - but most of the time gradually -you will feel the light and warmth of your neshomah,the love that will spread outward to your spouse,your neighbor,your friend.Your eyes and heart will be healed and it will heal others as well
