I need either some advice or a kick in the butt  :-\. I'm going through a stage now where I have no desire for anything. I'm very calm, maybe it could be described as peaceful, and I'm just doing the minimum things which I need to do in all areas of my life. I know I should be spending my time being more productive instead of lazy but I feel like my energy level is very low. I spend all my free time either reading interesting fiction (clean) or at safe sites on the web. It's like I just want/need to be on vacation all the time.

I remember I went through this stage years ago and it lasted a while (months), but I can't remember exactly how I broke out of it. I feel like I'm observing myself - in a detached way - just wasting my days but I have no real desire to put in the effort to make a change. I vaguely think that it's related to the fact that I'm not acting out, but I'm not sure  ???. Can anyone relate to what I'm going through ? Any insights ? Is this a normal withdrawal symptom after a few months, or is this totally unrelated ?

i also sometimes get like that, what helps me is truley putting life into perspective,

tke a grain of sand in your hand that tiney grain is worth a thousand years....about on tenth (hopefully slightly over ) is the legth of your be alive
now tae like 20 grains in your palm, your life is now tiney compared to that, almost insignificant....now my frined takle a whole handful of sand....whats your life now.....?
now go get a shovel (dnno if americans say a different word for it, maybe spade of digger or something) and start filling your whole room up if it, keep on shovelling, all thos grains representoing thousdands and gegillians and trillions and billions of years.

right there my frined, represented in this room is the amount of time your neshamo, your beautiful soal HBH gave you will survive, and how much time and space to you have to perfect it and let it reach the best level possible...remeber that origional fraction of the grain of sand...

your on this earth for a fraction of a second mate.... lets make it count.

when the vilna gaon dies he was clutching his tzitzit crying, when his talmidim asked him what was such a GAON crying for, he said he was so upset to eave a place where you could aquire a mitzvah for a few pounds

tyime on earth is so valuvble and its best to use each day to the max and make a difference becuas ethat opporuinty may soon run out, Bruit told me something cool: when the mosiach comes you will have no more challeneges, so no more chance to slef improvemnt, its only now, this second that you can so DO IT!!

NOW!!

just remeber why your here...
easier said than done, the best explanation if in the first chapter of mesilat yesharim

Refraining from masturbation = Huge headaches an d exhaustion
                              :'(

Nobody ever said change is easy

It sounds like you have free time on your hands. It also sounds like there is a lack of feeling of fulfillment. These are both areas that previous bad habits likely filled up, covering up the void that needs to be filled in a healthy way.

Like all great journeys, start small. A plan, an accounting, is a good place to begin. Perhaps this is a good time to begin to look at what your strengths are, where you can develop effectively? Some people believe they have no room for individual development. This isn't true. Everyone has many unique contributions to make in this world.

A friend once related to me that the first three words in the Torah contain the blueprint for all creative acts. B'reishis bara Elokim. We shoud read it as "beis" reishis bara Elokim, G-d began to create with "two/ beis". What are these two? A plan, without which nothing can be. And the material, without which a plan has no expression in reality. How does this apply to us? When we find that our creative aspects are needed to be employed (and this void in life points to this need), we must search out a proper plan. Only then can we gather ourselves for the next and necessary step. Consider yourself fortunate that G-d has chosen you to design a proper plan.

Jamie,
Zalmandovid,
Teshuvahilaah,

Thank you all for your advice - it was helpful !

Since Sunday I've been back to my normal energy level. I'm not sure what caused my energy to plummet last week. Maybe it was an unrelated thing like a virus in my body. Or maybe it was a withdrawal symptom - sometimes I feel that the struggle itself can sap my energy. Or maybe it's not the struggle but the underlying attitudes within the struggle that cause me stress. Whatever. Too much thinking. Time to just keep on trucking.

commando wrote on 28 May 2010 21:57:


1) Commando, have you figured out yet which one you're asking for -- advice or kick? (I'm only partly kidding; punishment brings pain that might help when a toddler walks into traffic; advice is a little different. And of course, 'observation' of what others see in our own postings can be the most valuable of all IMO.)

2) Jamie, you may have mis-read slightly an earlier post of mine. I'm not saying that Moshiachzeit (should it come soon!) provides no more challenges. Nope. It ain't nirvana, ain't olam haba. It's just that our challenges are unlikely to be a choice between good and EVIL. Rather (esp in the view of the RambaN, who takes a different approach than the RambaM), our battle will be between doing GOOD and doing NOTHING.

We won't be tempted to view a gorgeous bombshell, but we might be tempted to ignore a needy widow we view crossing our path. We won't be tempted to steal, but we might be tempted to fail to share with others.

But you DID get the basic message right: the scoreboard for overcoming a 'lav' might get frozen once Moshiach comes. So, that's what I mean when I say it's time to get to work. (And yes, I saw that you just posted that you just fell. I won't thread-jack here, but I mean it when I say, fell/shmell/get back to work.)

Briut wrote on 06 Jun 2010 13:42:



Briut,

Thanks for following up on this ! My "symptom" has for the moment disappeared, but if it resurfaces then I'll need some advice. And if you've had the same symptom and want to share your experience, I'd appreciate that too ! But no kicks right now  ;D

commando wrote on 06 Jun 2010 14:15:

Well, I've had something like the symptoms you posted. Glad they're dissipating in your case. These days, my symptoms are mostly a kind of mental distraction, inability to concentrate for every long on anything -- even tough to focus on the voices telling me to break my 'count.'

[And, I hope not too graphic, a kind of minor engorgement 24/7 that's not quite erection but still makes it sorta uncomfortable to walk around. And I'm in my 50s, so I find this more incomprehensible than if I were still a teen. Apologies if 'too much info.']

I think if yours return with a venegence, you'd find many folks here who could offer sympathy, advice, or perhaps even a kick.