Dear dov, I am not at all annoyed with your answer and appreciate your honesty,
Therefore I am going to comment on your answer and I beg you to answer honestly and I need you to tell me if I am misinterpreting you. I also hope you understand that I’m trying to be as objective as I can.

“You are thinking way too much. Stop it, OK”I think this is a very dangerous statement, in and of itself, secondly generally our emotions are controlled by our thinking, if we like it or not, you may as well say you are “feeling way too much stop it”, I have a feeling of guilt, I need to find out what thinking is causing this and work through it, otherwise how can I get rid of the feeling?
I will be repressing my thoughts, dangerous.
You may answer “addictive thinking is different” I’ll say “the need is stronger”[color]

“that should I actually figure-out the answer to this types of question, there is no evidence at all that I'd successfully put the answer into any consistent practice anyway”
Ok  here a feel emotional, my question is not some philosophical inquiry, emotions are real. I’m either feeling regret and guilt or I’m not. Must I feel regret after I masturbate or not?, it is not an activity that requires “consistent practice” Some one who is becoming frum is entitled to know if he should feel regret for becoming religious slowly. The same holds true for me.

“The reason every day is a no masturbation day for me is not because I am strong at all. It's a miracle. Hashem helps me not to have the nisayon at all most of the time. It is in the stupid little nisyonos that I need to work to surrender - I give up!....”

This paragraph is all about the 12 steps I don’t find this approach speaks to me, I have been using the approach of this site www.sexualcontrol.com. (there is a link to it on gye) I understand that many people have overcome addiction through the 12 steps, but it is not for me. I hope you are open minded enough to understand that there are other successful paths.

“ do not focus on the  issura for me - it is sakanta and therefore way more serious than issura, as the gemara states. This lust garbage ruins my life and will kill me. The main issue is the sakanta, not the issura, for me (b"H).”
Let me ask you something if a doctor (chas veshalom a million times) informed you that in a few years you are going to suffer a long, terrible, painful death with intense misery.
Would you be able to simply focus on something else and be content? Rather hard to do don’t you think? Someone who believes in films like “the seal of truth” and can masturbate with out focusing on punishment does not truly believe it.
Secondly I can relate to the harm addictive masturbation causes, but what about natural masturbation? This is a very controversial topic, but sorry it needs to be addressed.
I can tell you that I posted my question over here www.guardureyes.com/GUE/RTwerski/Can'tStop.asp to the very site that guard quoted from and they told me that I was being very rational and that natural masturbation can not be treated like addictive masturbation. Natural masturbation is a chok from Hashem, Hashem’s love motivates me for this.

Thanks very much dov, there are just a few things I need cleared up. I’m very sorry for taking up so much of your time.

“Frankly, this part really does sound like it'd be a futile thinking exercise for me. Perhaps I am really not getting what you mean.”To put it bluntly, some one who is from a secular background and is now keeping shaboss every other week. (he is striving to keep shaboss completely). He is sitting in shul on yom kipur, does he have to do teshuva even for every other week, or only for the weeks he took upon himself. Surely every one has there level of freewill. He should feel a deep desire to one day keep shaboss fully, obviously he should not regret taking things slowly if it worked for him.
Or should he “stop thinking about it” and sit in shul with a blank expression on his face like a zombie. I think most people will agree with me for shabboss, but by an issue like masturbation, it seems that all logic and rational thinking falls away.Why do you go right to the blank expression thing? And perhaps in thirty years from now you and I will actually look back at our mental state on 14, April, 2010 and perceive it as relative zombyism. But that's not my point, nor concern. I am not afraid of being the idiot that I am, today, yesterday, nor tomorrow. I am interested in doing the best I can right now, moron or not (though when all is said and done, I know I am a moron in the Big Picture of Reality).

So yes, the way I see it, I am progressing as a little child - Hashem's personal protege' (just like everyone else is) - scratching the crust of understanding even as a member of the "intelligentsia". When it comes to things that I am repeatedly fail and am struggling with, I need not concern myself today with whether I'll be judged on it, how I will be judged on it, nor whether I need to do teshuva on the past and to what degree. If I get better, I'll look at that then. The guilt and the ga'avah that causes it are both so toxic that letting go of them is often the only way to suceed at actually stopping. And I do believe that Hashem wants me to be better - not smarter. I will always be a work in progress.

W/respect to apparently clear-cut things such as aveiros like masturbation, chillul Shabbos, treif, etc...well, all I can say is that we aught to do the best we can and leave the cheshbonos to the Ribono she Olam. Is that considered zombyism? I don't think so. Actually, I think it is genius!

"Youch! I don't recommend masturbation as a way to fill the big empty hole in ourselves."
I agree but I’m saying there is no reason at all to feel guilty for trying to stop slowly. guilt means you could and should have tried harder guilt=choosing with ones free will the wrong thing when you had the ability to choose the write thing otherwise its not your fault
Trying to stop slowly? If you tried to stop cold turkey would that be any more successful? Perhaps yes, perhaps not. Some here seem to say that it backfires, others report that it's hell, and still others have said that Masturbation being totally out of the question for them gives them the only relief they have ever tasted in the past ten years! What works for you is what matters - not what you want to do, or the derech that's "mat'im" to you, but what works.
“PS. I don't know what 'natural masturbation' is”
If you want to know simply look on any medical website, or ask any mental health professional.
For you separating the two dos not work, so obviously you shouldn’t do it.
I find that for me separating addictive masturbation from natural masturbation works, I am not sucking these things out my thumb, a lot of experts will agree.
It is a fundamental principle that we are only jugged for things with in our current grasp, that’s why I don’t have to worry about this burning in hell thing.
I can’t just follow conventional method that don’t work for me.
If you want I can tell you what my addictive behaviors were compared to what they are now, with my attitude and approach. This is why I may seem stubborn in my belief, because its working.
all i what to do is let go of all this terrible guilt and like you say "get down to actions"
Im not asking you to agree I’m just asking you to see where I’m coming from.

Being a baylim over when/how I can do it and when/how I can't would make me crazy - I'd never find inner peace - and that is the main reason I wouldn't have done it that way. Nothing to do with aveiros. It's enlightened self-interest. Besides, I have faith that Hashem is correct that masturbation is not good for me, natural or not. Nu, maybe I am wrong somehow. But the power and cheshboning would certainly kill me, in the end - and that I do not need Hashem to tell me! I discovered it all by myself.

I am glad you found a derech that is working for you, bless you with success, and ask you for your brocha, as well. Shlach al Hashem y'Hov'cha - and work your bum off. That's my motto, I guess.

Thanks sooooooooo much!
I respect you.

Ditto.

If the question was murder or pork, my answer is -- no thanks to either, but I'd take an ice cream!