I am in a hotel room myself I ended up watching....
I left the room but I don't want to fall again
What do I do?

Do you have someone to call? Do you have any seforim with you? Do you know anyone lese in the hotel? Daven to Hashem!!!! Zochraini Na Vechazkaini Na!!!

Those are just a few quick fixes....

Hatzlocha!

-Yiddle

trying123 wrote on 15 Feb 2010 03:31:


Dear Trying123,

Kol HaKavod!  It's an enormous Madreiga to want to avoid falling immediately after you've just fallen. 

Pretend that you're severely allergic to peanuts, and you realize that the bowl of cashews that you just ate contained one peanut.  You have a medical emergency and you've got to act fast.  But, one thing is certain - you're not going to keep eating peanuts!

The GYE handbooks are your American Express cards -don't leave home without them.  If you don't have hard copies handy, you can download them here:

www.guardureyes.com/GUE/PDFs/eBooks/GuardYourEyes%20Handbook.pdf

www.guardureyes.com/GUE/PDFs/eBooks/GuardYourEyes%20Attitude.pdf

Read them, perhaps alternating between the GYE handbook and the GYE Attitude Handbook.  They will hopefully give you the Chizuk you need right now.

Hatzlacha!

I am really new to GYE, I am so happy that people care enough to respond...
Thanks
I am reading through some posts on the forum I hope this helps me...
My issue is not so much an addiction, its that I was very sheltered till now and was almost never MZ"L this is the second time that I can remember doing it intentionaly...
I hope I don't fall more

It's interesting that I just found a topic "Hotel Room Emergency" I read through the whole thing...

Only two times intentionally?  That's remarkable.  Stay with us to avoid allowing it to become a habit.

And now that the acute crisis is (hopefully) over, I have the privilege of officially welcoming you to GYE.

Dear Trying123,

Welcome to our community! Once you’ve arrived, there’s no turning back. Everyone here will just grab a hold of you and pull you up, up, up!

Scientific studies have shown that it takes 90 days to change a neural thought pattern that was ingrained in the brain through addictive behaviors. Did you join the 90 day chart on-line? Sign up over here.

We get cries for help every day, by e-mail and on the forum. Tzuras Rabim Chatzi Nechama    And that is why we created the GYE handbooks (links below). If you read them well, from beginning to end, slowly, and try to implement what you read, you will find the answers within them to enable you to completely turn your life around. You’re worth it.

Also, join the daily Chizuk e-mail lists to get fresh chizuk every day, and post away on this forum. You will get tons of daily Chizuk and support. This disease can’t be beat alone. It works best when you get out of isolation!

GuardYourEyes also offers various free anonymous phone conferences, where you can join a group of other frum Yidden, along with an experienced sponsor. See this page for four different options. Our conferences are taking place daily, throughout the week… This would be a tremendous step in the right direction for you and help you learn freedom from this addiction. Not only will you learn the secret of the 12-Steps – which is known to be the world’s most powerful program for beating addiction having helped millions world wide, but joining the group will be another way of GETTING OUT OF ISOLATION and connecting with others who are going through what you are.

Let me tell you a little about the two GuardYourEyes handbooks. They lay down the cornerstone and foundation of our work, and they make our network much more effective and helpful for people.

You see, until now, people would often get "lost" when coming to our website, not knowing what tips and techniques to try. For example, a beginner wouldn’t jump straight into therapy or 12-Step groups, while on the other hand, someone whose addiction was more advanced wouldn’t be helped by the standard tips of "making fences" putting in "filters" etc… So it was essential to develop a handbook which details all the techniques and tools to dealing with this addiction in progressive order. Now with these handbooks, anyone can read through and see what steps they’ve tried already, and if those steps haven’t worked, they can continue on through the handbook where the steps become progressively more powerful and "addiction-oriented".

And the second handbook, called the "Attitude" handbook, can also help anyone, no matter what level of addiction they may have. Often people write in to us saying that had they only known the proper outlook & attitude that we try and share on the GuardYourEyes network when they were younger, they would have never fallen into an addiction in the first place! So we hope that through this handbook, many addictions will be prevented.

The handbooks are PDF files, set up as eBooks, and they have bookmarks and hyper-links in the Index, to make them easy to navigate.

Note: You might want to print them out to read away from the computer. Keep in mind though, that if you do this, you won’t be able to click on the many web links in the articles. But you can always come back to them later. The truth is, it’s anyway good to go through the whole handbook once without clicking on links, just to get an overview of all the tools available. Once you did that, you can start again from tool #1 and read each tool through more carefully, click the links and study each technique and assess whether you have tried it fully yet or not…

Right click on the links below and select "Save Link/Target As" to download the handbooks to your computer.

1) The GuardYourEyes Handbook

This Handbook details 18 suggested tools and techniques, in progressive order, beginning with the most basic and fundamental approaches to dealing with this addiction, and continuing down through increasingly earnest and powerful methods. For the first time, we can gauge our level of addiction and find the appropriate tools for our particular situation. And no matter what level our addiction may have advanced to, we will be able to find the right tools to break free in this handbook!

2) The GuardYourEyes Attitude

The Attitude Handbook details 30 basic principles to help us maintain the proper attitude and perspective on this struggle. Here are some examples: Understanding what we are up against, what it is that Hashem wants from us, how we can use this struggle for tremendous growth, how we can deal with bad thoughts, discovering how to redirect the power of our souls, understanding that every little bit counts, learning how to bounce back up after a fall, and so on and so forth…

May Hashem be with you!

thanks I just went to the introduce yourself topic and Introduced myself...

Welcome trying123. Wow sounds familiar?? Hmmm... where did i see something like that before?? :-\  Oh well cant remember as of now.

Anyways, just wanted to let you know youve come to the right place. Keep on posting and hopefully youll get lots of chizuk and insu=ights to help us understand ourselves better.

Hatzlacha and wishing you all the best.

Oops didn't mean to steal your title...

trying123 wrote on 15 Feb 2010 12:14:
Hey dude, ask around here, dis drunk dont say nuttin serious.

I was chokin you man!!!! :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D

I guess youll have to hang around a little longer. Hey thats a good thing. Noone ever lost by hanging around this forum!!!

Keep it rollin. Check out Guards response in your other thread!!

Hatzlacha my friend!!!

Wow - now I'm truly amazed! You realized that you had to get up and leave the area...that's fantastic! It seems simple, but it can be incredibly difficult to do, so I hope you realize what a great move it was!

Bad news. After 59 days , I fell. Resorted to porn. I was upset at my wife, stressed over the kids. You see, I am helping my wife with online schoolwork. I often stay up till 12 am typing, accessing the school's website. I partially blame her. I was good until she went back to school online. I did not want internet, but b/c of her schedule and no other option, we got it. Not that I am justifying it, but to me, physically acting out is worse. Of course watching porn doesn't help, but I don't feel that I am addicted the way some others are. I was hoping to hold out until my wife was going to mikvah (2 days) then my urges drop. Going 2 months without doing the deed or porn is good for me. I just don't know what it was. I had a rough day working, doing another side job, then came home and took the kids out to eat, only to see my younger son didn't do homework over the long weekend. My wife was going to take my 2 yr old upsatirs when I said,"oh no! you do the homework and I'll take it easy!" I came down after 10 minutes and helped my son but got ticked off, that if I don't help her with her work, we paid for nothing. long story short, I fell... sort of. Just had to vent.
Penitent

Hey penitent. Keep venting its healthy!! But we cant lose focus. Blaming others will never get us anywhere!! Also if when were having a hard time we resort to porn and mast. it means we need to do things different. Although we went a long time it means when we get agitated we will go right back to it. So we need to teach ourselves to learn to let off steasm in  other ways!! But keep it up!! Just dust yourself off and pick yourself up and keep on going. Those 59 days will never be lost, fall or not!!

Sorry if i came off strong, but i only mean it for your good.

With love,

IT25

Reb Penitent - did you get my PM?

DID U EVER HEAR SOMEONE SAY

"FELL SCHMELL"!!!!

NU NU

U DID WHAT U DID

BUT DONT STAY DOWN ON THE FLOOR

DONT LISTEN TO THE Y"H NOW

YES HE IS PAINTING ALL  THE WORST CASE SCENARIOS
FOR YOU

TEL HIM

THAT YOU WIL NEVER BUY ANY GOODS OR SERVICES FROM HIM AGAIN

YOU HAD AN UNPLEASANT EXPERIENCE WORKING WITH HIS FIRM

PLEASE REMOVE ME FROM YOUR CLIENT LIST

AND
MAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

KEEP ON TRUCKING

P.S. A SEGULAH< DRINK A LCHAIM!!!!!!

B