Hey guys,

In one of Guard recent e-mails, there was a forum member who said that he was simply, "Through with investigating whether something is actually bad, and it will be ok as long as I stop before this or that happens."

I'm often in a situation where I know that 'going further' could lead me to fall. A part of me even genuinely wants to pull back and to be a better person. However, although I know I could do it if I really wanted to, either my curiosity or my lust just overpowers my desire to choose the path of discipline and self-denial.

Recently, when this his happened, I'm right in the middle of slipping when I keep in saying to myself out loud, "what am I doing, what am I doing, you mad man, stop before you regret it." Thank God that I've stopped before the point of no return and I haven't fallen.

Nevertheless, what is it that convinced you guys to turn away even from potential triggers? When I tried to do this a couple of times, I felt like was going to die for about 20 minutes afterwards.

Sorry if I've been melodramatic. Thanks again fellas.

Keep on trucking!

DL

 

   

Not melodramatic at all - I think we've all experienced that feeling of telling ourselves, "you're an idiot, you're an idiot, what are you doing?!"

What helped me stop? Opening up to other people has always seemed to help me - when I'm facing a situation that I know could get ugly, saying to myself "you're an idiot," doesn't seem to work, because I whine back, "but I NEED it (sniffle, pout)!" When I say it out loud to someone else, it becomes a lot clearer. Not easy, mind you, but clearer, and thus easier.

Trying to avoid those activities entirely is easier than stopping once you're halfway in.

What helps me say "no" to potential triggers is the realization that they can kill me.

what helps me say no to triggers is I know where they can lead.  knowing that in my mind makes me say NO thanks!!

Realize its a trigger

To a loaded gun

The gun is cocked

And guess who is staring into the barrel?

YOU!!!

But .. But..

No that was just bait.

Hey guys,

Thanks so much for the chizuk. I just acted on one of your suggestions and talked to a friend who is almost like an accountability partner.

I had strong urges to look at pictures of swimsuit models, which I have banned myself from doing. Nevertheless, my good old pal the YH managed to convince me that it wasn't soft porn and that I wasn't trying to perv over them, but merely trying to satisfy my curiosity. All this despite me having seen them thousands of times before and knowing full well that such things led to the viewing of even worse images......

Somehow, in moments like these, I find that I can choose to do the right thing not by feeling emotionally, but only by thinking what is right and wrong intellectually.

I've been saved for today by your timely intervention!

Ever played rainbow 6 on the Xbox? Well you guys were just like the snipers covering my backside!

Anyway, Hatzlacha and keep on trucking!

TC,

DL

Happy to be there...now all I need is a ghillie suit that can help keep me hidden from the yetzer hora... :D

hi guys
i'm new here and i was just reading and feeling a chizuk to know that there are other guys out there with similar probs
daaga belev ish
a problem shared is a problem solved

by the way today is the yahrzeit of the BAIS YISROEL of Ger zy"a, and he did a very lot to bring kedusha in the world. it is an auspicious day to pray for everlasting help in GYA and chizuk to keep on fighting
thanx loads
shmiro

Hey Shmiro,

Welcome to the GYE family! I hope youre stay here is long and used, like toilet paper! It is customary for newcomers to make a thread in the "Introduction" thread if you would like. There, everyone will get to know you more (dont worry still in an anonymous way).

Hatzlocha

-Yiddle

Yiddle2 wrote on 16 Feb 2010 15:05:


yeedle made a funny!

Hey SHmiro, not only will you find guys in your matzav, but you will even find an assortment of people who can speak you language (even yeshivish which merely a compilation of grammar misstakes of various languages), and relate to where you are holding. The spectrum here is varying, although I personaly used to feel a very strong pull of nnei torah. mybe it's just because people talk more addiction than torah? But we do boast a large variety of backrounds.

sHeMiRaTeInAyIm wrote on 17 Feb 2010 02:15:


I meant to say "long and usefull", oops  :D :D :D :D :D :D ;D ;D ;D ;D