Its basically impossible for me to install a filter that would work.
Basically, I have access to unfiltered internet through at least 4 different computers. Even if I install one, I can just reboot the entire computer within 5 minutes (which I guess, can help regarding pushing everything off for a couple of minutes).
I need the internet for what I do.
Compound this with the fact that I am in an environment with tons of single women.
Its frightening that I practically worked my whole life to get to where I am now - and now I look where I actually am and I'm screwed. I can't fathom dropping everything and leaving - as I said I worked my entire life for this. I guess I just have to keep on fighting the old fashioned way - which by now I'm smart enough to know that although I am 9 days clean it can falter at any moment.
Any ideas? Please?

the shots????

12 steps, telling your wife may be an option (may be a bad one)

Use this forum, write a virus that send a list of ALL your web activity, with a small screenshot. and give the list to a GOOD SHOMER. rav, mother, ????? _______,

Anonomously convince your office to monitor web activity, lemashal. if your daughter was in such a setting, you would find a way to do exactly that, so pretend it wasn't to save yourself but your children

Look at the stories, and see what happened to the last biz. exec. who got busted.

Filters have begun to be more popular in the secular business world, as porn is not exactly helping cost effieciency. Server based systems are availible (mudcrawlerz etc.); maybe speak to IT?

wow , i feel your pain man , :'(
accountability software . bring another person into your circle to help you . this way he'll know if you reboot or not . you don't have to tell him you have a problem ,just that you don't want that kind of openness . any frum rabbi or friend would get that . 
   

Thanks for the responses.
A little more about myself:
I'm single and in graduate school (in middle of nowhere).
The university (I believe by law) cannot monitor my internet usage (except downloads which I wouldn't do anyways).
Lamed vavnik: accountability software wont help much - as my access to several computers allows me to just reboot a computer at ease and erase any filters I installed (it will only delay - which in theory would help a little).
I only told someone about my problem once. It completely backfired.
Kanesher: Cant really convince a university to do anything.  :-(
Shemirateinayim: I am trying the 12 steps - which I guess is all I have - but it will definitely be harder.
I'm trying to use this forum as much as possible.
If my daughter would be in such a setting - I would have to pray really hard - but there wouldn't be anything I can physically do.
I read the stories. It helps for a little - but when my y'h kicks in, he also convinces me not to read anything else :-(
Oh man. Its tough.

yup

yup you got it HARD.

Can I make an appeal over here for everything the rabanim have ever said about the availability of the internet. Do we all agree to everything they have said.

Oh and some chizuk. R shimshun pinkus brings from the zohar. That in the Ikvasah Dimeshicha (the final period b4 mashiach) the world will be a "vaad Liznus".

cool no. If only it had some more meaning. The translation of Vaad, is an 'asifas chchamim' an gathering of men of intellect, for the furthering of intellectual pursuits. Yes, i know that this makes a humorous defenition, but give me a second to show you the truth in it.
In our current day and age, the advancements in technology are so fast paced, that few things are thought of as impossible. It is merely a matter of time until someone writes the software, or increases the efficiency of existent hardware. There still remains a vibrant industry in technologies outside of the entertainment centre, primamirl focused on improving productivity. But the single greatest feild of scientific advancement is ENTERTAINMENT. TV VIDEO, INTERNET, ELECTRONICS you name it. And people are so caught-up in the pursuit of these, that everyone takes issue with the "uselessness" of NASA.  Are we crazy, the great advances that they have achieved in the study of astrology dwarfs anythinng that secular science has ever known. The advent of telescopes, the hubble included, shame our previous way that we have related to them as mere "constellations". today we can see their colors hues shapes and movements. and in vivid color!
Yet despite all this, many people see these studies as a waste of money. The reason behind this, is that we DON'T CARE about a Vaad for sciences, since all we desire is a VAAD LEZNUS. We want to see our greatest minds and talent give us a reason to laugh and smile. We see this as the single greatest goal that science can attribute to.

This is the mindset of our generation, as delineated in the ZOHAR in the time of R Shimon Bar Yochai.

If you have enjoyed this article, or any of the other divrei torah on my threads, and would like me to speak at your function. Please send me an Email complete with a paper bag, with eyehole cut-outs.

That definitely makes it more difficult...

Can you join an accountability group? Do you think that might help? Give you someone to call, even, if you're feeling like you need to reach out?

How about never using the computer unless someone is in the room with you. If thats not realistic, setup a second screen mirroring yours and put in a public area or something. Or setup a webcam to watch you and give out the address... If the webcam dies they know somethign is up...

hey that's  a great idea. I can see the flyers already.  Write a program that puts a low-res screenshot of the screen on a webpage. So there will be some busha in watching anything not becoming of your standards. Oh and everyone must put a real name, and a phone #.  So if anyone catches someone in a 'questionable' place, you can give them a ring.

I can see it now! we'll call the "HaMashgiach" who's in!

(oh yeh and this site get's a special petur, not to be shown.) I'm serious it can solve the problem. Yeshiva's can put a monitor in the hallway showing what's going on in the computer room. So even if you get past the filter... you get busted.    Communities can make their own, so you have to think about what the neighbor's will say! It's perfect. And everyone must have their own name on there, not just the family name. 

Even in merely implemented on a small scale, it will work as long as the internet is connected. So ppl can always disconnect the internet to watch a dvd... but at least whenever they're online, they have a 'shomer'. it will make the internet into a petach patuach lirshus harabim. even according to the shitas that hold you must see into that part of the room.

First of all, can you install accountability software on the computers in your office?

The 12-Steps claim that we'll be able to live without lusting, even in an environment of lust. By working the 12-Steps properly, we will find that we no longer have to run and hide from the world.

As the Alcoholics wrote back in 1939 in AA (p. 101) about how they felt after recovering through the 12-steps:

"Assuming we are spiritually fit, we can do all sorts of things alcoholics are not supposed to do. People have said we must not go where liquor is served; we must not have it in our homes; we must shun friends who drink; we must avoid moving pictures which show drinking scenes; we must not go into bars; our friends must hide their bottles if we go to their houses; we mustn't think or be reminded about alcohol at all.

We meet these conditions every day. An alcoholic who cannot meet them, still has an alcoholic mind; there is something the matter with his spiritual status. His only chance for sobriety would be some place like the Greenland Ice Cap, and even there an Eskimo might turn up with a bottle of scotch and ruin everything! Ask any woman who has sent her husband to distant places on the theory he would escape the alcohol problem.

In our belief, any scheme of combating alcoholism which proposes to shield the sick man from temptation is doomed to failure. If the alcoholic tries to shield himself he may succeed for a time, but usually winds up with a bigger explosion than ever. We have tried these methods. These attempts to do the impossible have always failed."

So work the steps with a sponsor, preferably in a live group, and hopefully you'll learn these secrets.

Oh man. No safeguards I put in place ever hold once the y'h steps up. I guess I just need the encouragement. Thanks.

I feel your pain.

Here are a few ideas.Check in here often. Have a partner your in touch with often. some guys here will give you phone numbers.

Stay connected to us. We are your friends we want to help you.

Can you transfer schools to NY or Baltimore? If you spend all day online looking at pron you will fail law school.

Holy Yid wrote on 11 Jan 2010 23:58:


You're right about checking in.
Whoever said I'm in law school?  (and I cant transfer schools)
Thanks for the tips!