what is the proper teshuva one should do if he was oiver on znus?

aaabbb wrote on 23 Jul 2024 22:46:

First
1)address the issues that brought him to do the aveira.
2) Set up gedarim to make sure it doesn’t happen again.  
3)work on his relationship with hashem
4)then he can start thinking about teshuva 

vehkam wrote on 23 Jul 2024 23:06:

Shalom! Seems that you’re new here. 
GYE is a place of hope, here’s a warm hand. 

Vehkam, who answered you above, has a lot to say on this topic, from personal experience.  He is an extraordinary person. If you click on his thread in his signature, and read through the whole thing, after you wipe the tears from your eyes, I suspect that you’ll believe that true change and Teshuva is actually possible… He’s a uniquely qualified mentor and he cares. There are other great folks here too. 

Wishing you a lot of Hazlacha - please stick around. 

Chaim Oigen

Don't forget than an essential part of teshuva is forgiving yourself!

To quote my Rebbi - don't add bracha l'vatala to your list of aveiros. When saying selach lanu, believe it.
Hatzlacha

Hi!
Number 1, follow Vehkam and CO
Number 2- Teshuva is about the future, not about the past. Teshuva means we change the way we act from here on in, and by choosing differently, by acting differently, that is the tikkun for the past. The only thing that's about the past is the charata, and the defintion of charata is the decision that if I were to have that chance again I would choose differently, which I amplify by choosing differently from today. 
So, My dear friend, don't let he past haunt you. Just change the way you act from now on. And then, Hashem in His great mercy just wipes away whatever we have done.

Of course, changing the way we will act in the future is not so simple. But for that, stick around here, connect to the oilam, and you'll soon be on your way!