I'm very bothered by this topic. i have a lot to say and so im just going to start the ball rolling and take it from there.

If a person is walking down the street and sees an attractive woman who is not his wife, and he has lustful thoughs about her, does that make him a lust addict?

if not, when does one graduate from a normal human who has desires to a lust addict?

fightingyid wrote on 24 Dec 2009 04:38:


I would say absolutely not- it makes him a normal man for whom the Torah commanded him "v'lo sasuru". This pasuk wasn't written for malachim who don't have these taivas, it was written for a normal man who naturally would be prone to lust after her, but the Torah then commands him not to.

My take, at least.

fightingyid wrote on 24 Dec 2009 04:38:


I agree with SuperYid.  But if the person starts making an effort to see improper things, it begins to take up a great deal of his time and focus, and/or it is otherwise causing his life to become unmanageable, that is a sign that he's becoming an addict.

Of course, in the case of Internet pornography, which addiction therapist Michelle Rappaport has called "as addictive as crack cocaine," it is much easier to become an addict.

rehab-my-site.com/guardureyes/forum/index.php?topic=1264.0

I'm curious to hear different thoughts on this, as well. I'm also interested in hearing what the practical difference is. For example, take the situation above - if both a regular cucumber and a pickle are facing the same non-wife, what would be the ideal approach to avoid lustful thoughts, for each?

Scientifically, part of the definition of an "addict" is that it begins to consume your life. Lust is natural. Without it, why in the world would anyone ever procreate (I heard that once)?

Well, as has been mentioned here before, there's "lust, and then there's "Lust."

Regular lust is a healthy sex drive, focused in the right ways. Unhealthy Lust is when it starts to make us do things we don't want to, in unhealthy ways.

What does "taking over your life" mean? OK, there's an extreme, when someone is spending 16 hours a day looking at internet porn, or trying to meet women. But what about when time-wise it's not that much, but it's still an unwanted intrusion against your values, that you want to stop, but have trouble with?

If we're not addicted on some level, why do we keep doing something that we don't want?

Its been a while since I took a neuro course in school, but, at least scientifically, there are different terms/levels used to describe someone: addiction, dependence - but in reality, its just semantics, and a way to regulate treatment.
Bottom line (according to me) - Just feeling something is your body's natural response to external stimuli. To go and now have that feeling dictate how one physically acts leads that person towards the path of becoming an addict.

I agree with you - depending on the types and extent of the steps, we've gone a certain distance down the path, but once you've stepped onto the path, things can get dangerous and slippery. And anyway, it's smells  ;D i don't want to be on that path at ALL!