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Becoming aware of triggers
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A platform of recovery for Jews who find themselves struggling with addictions to pornography, masturbation or other sexual problems. Post anonymously about your struggles without fear of anyone finding out who you are. Ask questions, post answers and be inspired! Get tips and guidance from the experts who moderate this forum, as well as from fellow strugglers.
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TOPIC: Becoming aware of triggers 233 Views

Becoming aware of triggers 17 Apr 2021 21:14 #366961

  • pureheart
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Thank God, I am 48 days clean. I can't say I have ever gotten this far. I feel great. more free. I have been able to learn and daven, create a healthier sleep schedule. More calm and secure with my wife. Chasdei Hashem.

Over shabbos we had a number of heated fights/arguments. Nothing serious but still very frustrating.

For the first time in 1.5 months, I found myself browsing youtube trying to find something illicit to watch. I didn't go to porn but I was very clearly trying to find something to open that gateway.

BS'D, I was able to stop myself. The question is, now that I found this trigger, what can I do to avoid this slip up in the future? 

Re: Becoming aware of triggers 18 Apr 2021 02:03 #366979

Mazel Tov on 48 days!

I'm not married yet so not sure the best advice to avoid that trigger but definitely definitely be very careful where youtube is involved because even things that aren't objectively porn can still be very triggering depending on the person so definitely steer very clear (for myself youtube was a huge problem so I just blocked it on my computer and phone - no way of accessing it. Because what do you really need it for?)
Think about how good you'll feel if you say no to desire and compare that to how bad you'll feel if you say yes.

Desire is unique in the way that it is never fulfilled -  if you give in the desire comes back even more powerful in just a few days. Telling yourself that its ok because this is really the last time doesn't work because you are just adding new images to your head that will cause future falls.

The Joy of triumph over the yetzer hara is worth the effort it takes to win. It IS worth it! Keep fighting!

My thread: 
Aiming to be better

Feel free to contact me at evedhashem1836@gmail.com

Re: Becoming aware of triggers 18 Apr 2021 03:33 #366986

  • hakolhevel
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pureheart wrote on 17 Apr 2021 21:14:
Thank God, I am 48 days clean. I can't say I have ever gotten this far. I feel great. more free. I have been able to learn and daven, create a healthier sleep schedule. More calm and secure with my wife. Chasdei Hashem.

Over shabbos we had a number of heated fights/arguments. Nothing serious but still very frustrating.

For the first time in 1.5 months, I found myself browsing youtube trying to find something illicit to watch. I didn't go to porn but I was very clearly trying to find something to open that gateway.

BS'D, I was able to stop myself. The question is, now that I found this trigger, what can I do to avoid this slip up in the future? 

Block youtube on your phone?

But honestly, the real trigger was the fight with your wife. Is this something that happens often?
My Thread:The Road To Being Honest With Myself (and others:)

My other Thread: My Daily Inspiration

I'm not a slow learner, I'm just quick to forget" - Eli Nash

A bit of honesty and less over confidence might help me - Imperfection
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