i tell for my wife the whole situation 3 weeks ago b"h she is supporting me very much i feel that i do %100 the right think for telling were because only this way i am holding by 14 days but my wife is very scared that i will not make it                                                                                                                                i would like to hear from other people were how i could build my wife to be much stronger that i will get out thank you

ybsys wrote on 20 Feb 2020 20:57:

Dear ybsys
We are working together for a few weeks and I can tell you that it is very rare to see a person that is so committed to recovery like you. 

The best way to make your wife confident is to be open and she will see how you're growing and becoming better and stronger which will make your relationship much better too.

​You are definitely going on the right track and you will be clean and fully recovered very soon with Hashem's Help.
Keep is all posted on your good progress. 

Dear ybsys,

First of all i have to acknowledge you,  for taking the courage and share your struggles with your wife...
Just the fact that you were OK to share it with her already earned a tremendous amount of trust and love towards you. this showed her how important she is to you and that she is your go to the person when you need to share something private.

Now regarding your question, i would say that the best thing to do that can make her feel more confident and less scared about you is:

1) whenever the topic comes up or whenever you see she feels scared... just tell her.... i totally understand that you are concerned... i am sure its not easy to be involved with having a husband with this struggle and i really appreciate the fact that you care and you are concerned about me... i couldn't have wished for a more supporting wife... thank you so much... etc.  

2) after you acknowledged the way she feels about it.. just try to tell her that this is not WHO YOU ARE its just a bad place WHERE YOU FELL INTO but you are truly a pure loving person...

Hope this helps,
Best of luck,

dear i love myself                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                        you are realy bringing out strong points its will realy help me  this point  (i am sure its not easy to be involved with having a husband with this struggle) is wonderful this i didn't think before                                                                                                                                                                                                      thank you good luck

Hi. ybsys. 

Just be be very careful the way you proceed, don’t use your sharing with her,  just to make you feel better, or to have a shoulder to carry the weight. You just have to make sure to keep your side of the road clean, and your wife will pick it up and she will feel secure. 

Mit hatzlucha.