ovadia wrote on 28 Dec 2009 13:15:
I am interested to know if anyone can relate to the following "trigger". I have found in the past (and yesterday was nearly another example) that days which have more concetrated Ruchniyus (for loss of a better description) will cause me afterwards to ...... For example after days of Selichos, or after I have Yartzeit. As if, after I have been hyped up spiritually I am uncomfortable being at that level so I bring myself down again. Does this sound wierd ?
I grappled with that a lot. I'd feel like I was doing so great, and coming so much closer to Hashem. I felt like I was flying all day long.
Then, this feeling didn't last, and I'd feel REALLY down when it left; I'd almost fall.
So, for I a while I tried to knock myself down right away from these highs. I would davka try not to reach for this feeling.
We're I'm holding now is I try to HOVER a little bit. It's this inspirational feeling, but not too much. ANd as it comes and goes, I don't crash because of it.
I try to stay more-or-less even keel. I try not to get too high, and I try not to get too low.