Had 2 falls in the past 2 months. Each one was on a day which should have been a happy day, a day to celibate. One was my birthday; I couldn't find anyone to hangout with, get something to eat or anything else. I spent most of the day alone and feeling down. The 2nd was just a few days ago, the 1st night of Hanukkah. I was going to a party with friends from shul; had not made it there when I got call in to work and ended up lighting the candles by myself after work. In the past my acting out has been due in no small part to feeling lonely, but these past 2 times seemed different. I was lonely not only for that significant other, but because I couldn't even get together with "the guys" and just hangout.

Hey man, we've all been there. At least I know I have. What helps me is to just take it one day at a time, stay focused on other things like learning, working out, saying extra tefillos, and finding good mussar seforim on the inyan. Shomer Emunim is one, Ohr L'Tsion by Rav Ben Tsion Abba Shaul is another, and the Kav haYashar is fantastic as well. I have found that the shiurim of Rabbi Yossi Mizrachi at www.DivineInformation.com are an incredible help also.

The other thing which helps me is to be tethered to this website. The more I am corresponding with other like-minded Jewish men struggling with this, the more it helps. When you ask for siyatta d'shmaya and for HaShem to weaken the koach of the yetzer hara in this area, and are osek in the hishtadlus to break free and help others, I personally have found that I do much better.

I would guess others feel the same way.

The ikkar zach is not give up. That's ma'aseh satan to be misya'esh.
B'hatzlacha.

Avraham